Seriously! How the hell can you tell between Flirty and Friendly. Too many straight girls do this friendly flirt thing and it's super confusing because hey, they're flirting with you. But they aren't interested in you. Are there any tricks? Signs? Dear God how do you tell when a girl genuinely likes you or is just being a flirty straight girl. My guy friends laugh when I tell them this because some of them experience friend flirting too and think it's funny that I fall for it more then they do (Jackasses, but I love them. They my bros!) I had a co-worker that was exceptionally "flirty" and one of my other co-workers even asked if we were dating because we were always together. (and some of our conversations were borderline suggestive.) But she had a boyfriend, (I only say had because I have no idea of her relationship status now) but she stopped bringing him up a while ago and she continues the "flirting" so I'm super conflicted and don't know what to do. I know I can't be the only girl who is confused about this girl flirting thing. Any advise you wise girl experts you? PLEASE!
I think that, since I play flirt a lot with my friends, that a lot of the time, it could be that they're just playing. If they're strangers, it's more likely REALLY flirting. But, about your friend, it sounds like she really is flirting with you. But be sure that she's single before you make any moves!
She had a boyfriend when she started "flirting" with me, which is where the confusing started. She never told me about her boyfriend while she was flirting with me. She never told me directly that she had a boyfriend. Her mom was the one that first mentioned him to me actually. It was even weirder because I felt like her mom knew I liked her and she was trying to spare me the pain, that or it was a "back off my daughter" type thing. She never really said she disliked me but hey, it was an observation from working with her. Even her mom stopped talked about a boyfriend and I'm not sure how to ask her, that's not something I ask out of the blue. It's hard to tell if she's still seeing someone. Hell I don't even know how she feels about the LGBTQ community.
According to my cousin, who is a straight female, there's a "limit" to how far women can go with their flirting, experimenting, compliments. Once they pass that line, others start to question them and get weirded out. I was also reading an article on barsexuals, and several lesbian and bisexual commenters thought a few of these girls could use their drunken behavior as a way of indulging their same-sex attractions, but be able to play it off later.
You might have a look at this: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/sexual-romantic-orientation/155560-friendly-flirty.html
You know you redirected me twice yes? But the article doesn't help too much. Friends smile at each other all the time. If you ask me straight girls are touchy feely with their friends (hugging, touching on the arm or knee, ext.) The bitting the lip thing is kinda a universal flirt thing. And the Hug thing. An interesting article though, really interesting. The thing it my friend started flirting with me almost immediately after we met (normal for me to think she was flirting. BUT THEN the boyfriend bomb and that shattering of my heart.) There should be a more clear line of what Flirting and whats Friendly. Isn't there any real "No doubt that's flirting" thing? Like a tall tale sign of it? GOD Guys are easier to figure out!
The best way to do it is to ask her if she is flirting with you. She might act surprised but at least you asked her. I've had the same problem and when I openly ask straight girls if they were really flirting, they usually either back off or say yes. Even if she backs off and says she wasn't flirting, at least you'll know for sure and you won't have to waste any more time on her.
I think all the straight guys can sympathize with you on this. It's hard to know if she's flirting or if you're in the friend zone.
First of all, just because she says she is straight doesn't mean she really is. I know a lot of girls who lie about their sexual orientation all the time and pretend to be straight just for the acceptance of their family and friends. Second, even if she is straight you might be her loophole. I've met plenty of straight women who (after years of only being with men) decide they want a woman for whatever reason, so this might be the case. Third, she might be doing it for attention. As a lesbian, I've met countless straight women who have flirted with me just for validation that they are still attractive. If that's the case, don't give her any validation. Let her man do it. That's what he's for. Last but not least, straight women are socially conditioned to be extremely flirtatious with each other. Flirting has become so common between straight women, literally the only thing they don't do is fuck each other. The only way you can tell if she is really into you is if she is showing signs of sexual arousal (hard nipples, blushing/flushing, squirming in her seat, touching her thighs a lot, Freudian slips in conversation, can't stop staring at your privates, nervous when she's alone with you) and even then, these signs are not always accurate. Some would argue that even if the vagina is wet it could just be natural discharge from exercising, so even if you touched her vagina and found it was wet that could just be nothing. The best thing to do is to ask her out. That will let you know if she is interested or not. Even if she says no, at least you let her know your intentions and maybe she'll be more aware of how she's acting next time.
I had a straight friend that I had a crush on once upon a time. I came out to her and she (mind you, 100% straight) used to flirt with me for some wierd sort of amusement or attention. She would pretend she was going to kiss me and give me signals. I thought it was so weird! I still don't understand her reasoning, but I guess some people just like to mess with others. How can you tell? I knew it in my heart because we were really close and I knew her history. I knew it, but didn't want to believe it and it ended up breaking my heart a little. I dont know...for me, I knew because she was obsessed with men. And it was an essence she had. How do I explain it? Like a quality of straightness, which I know makes no sense. Maybe I sensed the fact that her advances weren't genuine. Maybe my gaydar never went off. Maybe both. I'd say the best thing to do is to ask, honestly, because you may not have that insight or history to go on. (I just realized this thread is really old, but I'm gonna post this anyway.)
Oh my god i'm sort of glad i'm not out now. WOW that sounds confusing and frustrating. Damn i bite my lip when i'm nervous and i have never attempted to flirt with anybody. I hope its only ever come off as a nervous habit. Idk how i'll figure it out when i'm out. I mean just me, at work as a cashier i see girls/women a lot and want to compliment something on them i genuinely like - like their hair or their shirt - but then i don't cause i don't know how that'll come off. If it'll be weird cause i'm the cashier or if it'll come off as too much.
