Would you come out even if you had a homophobic family?

Nope, I won't...

 

I would definitely wait until I was comfortable and confident with my standing both financial and emotionay.

 

HELL. NO.

i'm currently living with my homophobic family and i'm not coming out unless I get emotionally distressed enough to come out without really wanting to (i've come really close to doing so a few times, which scares me)

 

My family is homophobic and I'm not out to them at all. I honestly think it would be better to never come out to them. Don't get me wrong I hate living in the closet, but it would only make my life harder if they knew.

 

My family is somewhat homophobic. That's why I haven't come out yet. My mom thinks I'm in a relationship with a guy, when it's really a woman. We're in a LDR, but we eventually plan on meeting up and moving in together. So once I'm settled and secure, I will have no choice but to tell them.

 

I've got both an homophobic and transphobic family. I've thought about coming out to them but, at this point in time, it most likely would be very unwise for me to do this. I would only do this if I could cut off contact immediately if things were to go wrong. Ideally, I wouldn't come out face to face. If I had to, I would only do so in the presence of other people that knew of my situation.

 

Same here...

 

Probably not to my family members.

"Don't ask, don't tell"

 

Not if I lived with them.

 

When I have a stable income, a place to live, and absolute independence, then yeah I will. Right now, no I can't.

 

Just came out to my family the other day, so yeah. Spoken to them like once since then, but oh well. Still went better than I expected.

 

I don't think I'd come out if I was absolutely certain my family were homophobic, and I would try to prevent them finding out until I can sustain myself financially etc as others have said.

Once that's the case, I still don't think I'd immediately TELL them, but I'd certainly take the pressure off myself trying to hide it. If they find out, so be it.

 

This question is one of the biggest emotional push/pull scenario's on the coming out journey. Do you risk everything and go for broke by coming out, or do you stay in the closet and maintain the somewhat false relationship with your family? This question normally leads to another question...
What will damage me more - coming out or staying in [the closet]? Then begins the emotional bargaining process and either way, you stand to lose. Or do you?

If you don't come out, you definitely lose. No risk taken, no reaction tested.. no moving on. You are stuck where you are, in the closet, with all the unhappiness that goes with being there... BUT, if you do come out, will you actually get the reaction you are expecting, or could you be pleasantly surprised? There are certainly people who change their homphobic tune when a family member comes out to them. Happened with me.

Of course, coming out to people who have made homophobic statements isn't without risk and I concur with everyone who advised leaving home first and being financially independent, but there is a potential reward if you are brave enough to come out. It could go wrong (I totally accept that), but it could also go much better than expected. How good would that feel? However it goes, you will no longer be living a lie. Unfortunately, staying in the closet has no rewards and over the long term could lead to a marked deterioration in your emotional well-being.

So if you are in this scenario now and you are doing the emotional bargaining think about it carefully.

 

I'm not telling my family until I can look after myself. Which means I have got a few years before I can tell her.

Or when I get a girlfriend.

 

I came out to my Dad, not a homophone at all & could care less. The rest of my family however.. Hmm.. I don't even know.

 

I don't really want to come out. My family's inevitably not going to understand, and I don't want to have to deal with that. I mean, I think they have an idea of what my gender is, but I don't want to talk about it with them. They might try to get me "help", and I'm going to have to be like, "Motherfuckers, I don't live with you anymore. You can't tell me what to do."

 

My parents...never...even though I am financially independent and don't live with them...I couldn't bear the disappointment...the look that says I've let them down again. My kids...my sister and my friends know...and they were just like...yeah...so? But my parents...no they would never be so accepting...