On some online threads and other sites I've seen people say femme and butch or stud. I dont seem to fit in with any of those so I don't feel the need to label myself. But I do know that I'm a female and I like only females. Therefore, I'm a lesbian and I hope to meet a girl like that someday. But I'm not sure where to look, any suggestions? I cant go out and meet other lesbians because I don't like to do things alone.
I'm a closet bisexual teen, but I have lesbian parents. They don't sport labels, but they call some other lesbians "butch" when they're too manly. It always shocks me. Anyway, I don't feel that I fit those labels at all, either. I feel that they are just the new, derogatory terms for tomboy and girly, but in the LGBT world. I, too, want to meet a girl who doesn't really fit those labels, either. I'd relate to her so well.
I have always associated this sorts of labels as ways to check for compatibility when it comes to dating. Trust me, two bottoms do not make a top, and two tops do not make a bottom. So there are all of these nice ways to refer to sexual possession, such as 'aggressive' and 'passive' which totally throws things the wrong way because there are passive tops and aggressive bottoms. And there are feme tops and butch bottoms.... LGBT are stuck with a bi-gendered world were the majority follow semi-strict roles based on their parts. We are trying to find words that suit the general 'roles' that suit us without asking 'so are you the woman/man?' which is totally offense to anyone who asked that. The personality side of things (passive/submissive) is often important to people in search of a potential mate. So these labels are often interchangale for alluding what role you are in bed to what kind of person you are in general. So yeah, its all pretty confusing.
Oh yeah, it is very offensive. I had been asked that a couple times about me and my ex, and I just said " umm we're both women." But yes it all seems very confusing
Don't concern yourself with labels haha. I don't fit any of them either, I'm more of a tomboy, wear unisex/more masculine clothes and into guy things but I'm not the stereotypical "butch." I'm just myself, and not gonna change that. I sometimes feel like it just perpetuates gender roles sometimes too. I'm attracted to more feminine girls but I wouldn't force any gender roles on her just because I'm more guy-ish. I want someone balanced and can just be herself.
That's how I am too, except I'm not really into the extremely feminine girls. I've been a bit of a tomboy most of my life, but I can get dressed up in something girly if need be. My ex was like that too. Now she cut her hair short, dresses in only mens clothing and still looks absolutely beautiful. That look works on some people, I guess. Haha
