Personality Vs. Looks

There has to be physical attraction there, but personality is what's gonna keep you interested in the person

 

I fall in love inside-out if that makes any sense. Looks don't matter for me, honestly. I don't say that to prove I'm deep or something, even I think it's kinda weird. The first thing I notice about someone is the way they talk, the expression of their face, their manners. Then, if I'm interested, I start getting to know them better and maybe I like them even more. After that I start to notice the appearance, and I find the person pretty or ugly depending on the impression I got from their personality.

 

It is the same for me.

 

Personality. I despise shallow people who only focus on the exterior. Obviously there has to be SOME physical attraction...but it registers so low on my criteria that I rarely acknowledge it. Short, tall, fat, thin anything in between....if you have a good personality, I'll be interested.

 

Lets face it people cannot see your personality from a distance so looks are what i notice first. That said "cute" disappears pretty quick if you're a douche bag.

It may take me a bit longer to realize it's there but personality lasts.

 

Wow, an ugly guy like me actually has a chance!

Seriously, as a not-so-attractive guy, it has to be personality for me first. I'll talk to anyone, and if they can actually hold an intelligent conversation, then perhaps there might be something there.

---------- Post added 9th Feb 2014 at 03:46 PM ----------

On the other hand, ugly might not be so bad if the personality is there to go along with it.

 

Both for me because If I don't wanna have sex with you this isn't gonna work and if your personality sucks like your a bitch it's not gonna work even if I wanna have sex .

 

Personality. I would like to connect on a emotional level first, then take it the next step. If they don't have a nice personality its like meh.. you know?
But looks are what you see first most of the time.

Still if the guy is cute, but then i find out hes kind of a jerk thats when he becomes unattractive.

 

Personality, absolutely. Looks can grab your attention, but without a personality, looks are doomed to hold that attention. Looks can't overcome a dull mind. Might as well hang up a picture of someone hot on your wall. Personality, on the other hand, can overcome looks. As long as you're not a Wookiee. lol

 

rest of text cut for brevity

I guess for a demisexual (if I really am one, don't know anymore) that it's different.
The visual appeal is what first attracts me to women first, but I have a very wide standard when it comes to attractiveness. As long as a women doesn't weigh 300 + pounds or has very bad hygiene, I might something visual to be attracted to them. Breast size isn't important, or hair length, or how the clothes she wears. Personality however is what sustains an interest for me afterwards, at least it has since I stopped being a teenager. Back then I hooked up with a girl once mainly because my first love broke up with me, and this girl was the only other available lesbian I knew about. We had some good times, and liked each other, but it wasn't love for either of us, mainly just sex and friendship. It was about as fulfilling as masterbating with a partner instead of by myself, if that makes sense, and not what I was looking for.

Last year I had an intimate relationship with a guy for the first time in my life. It seems to be over now, and we're just roommates, so I might be back to just lesbian relationships again. The odd thing is, when I first was intimate with this guy, he was just a really good friend, someone who helped me emotionally when I really needed it. It felt like a genuine physical attraction to him sexually, but it was never based on looks. I never looked at his face or chest or abs or muscles (and particulary not his penis) and
thought "Oh boy he's hot." He could so easily be a model or a porn star, but I didn't care about that. I was attracted to him dispite his looks. We had a pretty good thing while it lasted, and I wish it was the way it used to be, but its not anymore. I still love him though, so maybe I'm not demisexual. Sorry, the point is sexual attractiveness for some people isn't entirely based on looks I guess.

 

Its easier to get into my heart with personality >.>

 

Personality is more important to me overall, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't attracted to looks as well. I just place personality more important because I prefer long-lasting relationships. In long-lasting relationships, your partner will eventually lose their good looks anyway, but the person inside that you love makes you hang on.

 

"Beauty is only skin deep"

 

For a long term relationship personality is definitely more important than looks. That said, i agree there does have to be some amount of physical attraction. But i think if someone has a great personality and you really connect with them it can make them seem more physically attractive, if that makes sense... I don't think it works the other way round though.

 

I don't think everyone loses their looks. I find there are people who get better and better, and others who just maintain it. But whatever, that's a subjective thing too I guess...

But anyway, for me it's all a culmination or something. I like it when i find someone attractive on their looks, but I love it when their personality is also awesome to me. Like how they are with their mannerisms/behaviour/emotions and just their whole everything of how they be and who they are is very important and attractive and also makes someone even more attractive to me.

 

I would say looks are important to me, but they're not the absolute in dating. I might find it hard to date someone who is lacking in the intelligence department, but I have accepted that not everyone has the level of interest in 'obscure' or 'geeky' subjects like I do (meteorology, geography, history, economics, politics, astronomy etc), so the chances of me having an in-depth discussion about sudden stratospheric warming with anyone are pretty remote.

In fact, I usually avoid going down that route because I would bore the pants off most people.

However, just because someone is a little dim, doesn't make them bad. As long as they're genuinely nice and fun to be around, I can overlook most things.

 

To paraphrase something Owen posted in a similar thread, looks will get you through the door but it's personality and emotional connection that will keep you from getting kicked back out.

 

I'm more into someone's personality. I'm not one of those people who will say looks don't matter because I would be lying. But I would prefer someone to have an awesome personality and really connect with me.