Very Irritating Phrase - "All the Good Guys are Gay"

Yeah, and although I hear it from both sides, gay men probably have more reason to complain when it comes to more guys playing for the other side, because, well, something like 95% of men will identify as straight.

It's probably a combination of self-pity, idealization, and entitlement in this case. I've noticed I've gotten hit on a lot more when in a relationship, and sure, it's even more amusing to see the looks on people's faces when I tell them it's not with a woman.

 

I agree, it's annoying. However, when these phrases are used, I don't think they're really taking logistics into account

 

I love this phrase! Even i use it If someone says it, i reply "and all the hot ones are straight"

 

I have to agree - All the good guys are gay - 'tis true... @jack93 - have to dissent - the hottest men are absolutely gay men and boys!

 

i sort of like it, it makes me feel good about myself, but yeah the people who say it are just saying it out of self-pity

 

I kind of agree, all the gay guys i've met are extremely nice. Most of the straight ones are just cocky and don't know how to treat any of the straight girls i've talked to.

 

It's basically a derivative and a reinforcement of the gay stereotype. Typically the the type of women who will bemoan that false realisation are those looking for a man who is not only good looking but takes care of his looks/how he dresses, feels more comfortable discussing emotions, general culture/arts, see where I'm going with this? .

Oh and maybe what those women consider "nice guys" are guys who don't obviously hit on them right away and can have a conversation without staring at their boobs...

 

I think that what your personality is does not depend on sexual orientation.

 

I think they might be seen as the 'good guys',
As they don't have an ulterior motive regarding a womans physical attributes,
Which seems to be an ingrained fear with women,
"Is he loving me for 'me', or my body".

I don't think many of the gay guys I know have been that 'nice',
Quite the opposite at times,
So the phrase just seems stereotypical and wishful

 

Maybe the numbers actually have something to do with it. If only 10 out of every 100 guys I meet would be interested in me but 90 out of every 100 women would be then wouldn't it make sense that you'd need to be seen as more of a catch to find a good partner. Maybe having plenty of fish in the sea just creates bad fishermen? (Excuse the atrocious pun)

 

I've heard this phrase, too, but it doesn't irritate me. This phrase is actually very loaded in a way.

One of the members here mentioned how a gay man makes the perfect husband; that is, for the stereotypical qualities, but not for his sexuality.

You take a mathematical approach, which is something I would do. However, the math doesn't always work. There's a lot more to it, I believe. The guy with looks, enough sensitivity but not too much, money, and totally straight is quickly spoken for. Some even play the field. More women are chasing that type of guy than there are in supply. The jerk is also surprisingly in demand, if he looks good, because it's just basic biology. This leaves a lot of guys who might have good jobs and money, but not look that great, be socially awkward, or have some deal-breakers that causes some single women to pass on them. That then leaves gay and bi men. There are a large number of successful, independent, intelligent, and good looking men in this group, and they are not on the market. Without as many distractions, they are able to cultivate these aspects. Some of them also have these charming personalities. Some have shallow personalities, too.

Some of these guys may have started batting for the other team along the way. They were passed on earlier and a friend of mine (who comes up with some real winners which some may not like) made a joke about this and said "They all say they want a nice guy, but all the nice guys turned gay." I wonder how much turning there really is and if his remark makes sense, but it was funny. However, when you think of the Rock Hudsons, the Rupert Everetts, and the Gareth Thomases, many women were disappointed. And they have real life counterparts in more regular walks of life. Driving or walking through the Castro often gets a lot of straight women to make comments like "what a waste" when they spot a looker. I've heard these comments and have bitten my lip.

 

The phrase does have annoying potential, however, based on my own experiences...nearly every guy I've liked turned out to be gay so yes that "all good guys are gay" (pretty nice alliteration there btw) can be pretty true

 

Do they mean just cis men or gay transmen as well?

 

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It's true tho. We do tend to be pretty fantastic.

 

Being that I am a gay man, it's a compliment; however, if I was a straight man, i could see myself getting annoyed by the phrase. Really, I just view it as a joke, mostly. However, I see truth in it in terms of the stereotypical qualities attached to gay men--gay men tend to have more qualities straight women can identify with in comparison to straight men, I would think.

 

Some of us are bi

 

Or if you were a straight woman previously involved with a gay man unknowingly;

A single gay man who considers himself "nice" but can't seem to be noticed;

Someone who has only had negative experiences with gay people.

Alright, I'll stop now. :eusa_whis