My mom just asked me not to wear a skirt for Thanksgiving dinner. So, I'm kinda pissed... The reasoning was "well, some of the guests are kind of... dinosaurs. I support you, but if you wore something like that, they'd probably be set off and say something." So ya... Why did I agree to have dinner with cissexist people again???
She's just using it as an excuse for gender policing you on her own wishes; the guests are a convenient excuse. I know that tactic, and I'm sure you know it better than I do. She may support you, but if she doesn't want you to be yourself, then she's more interested in sucking up to the people who oppose your existence. :dry: 'Tis the season to have your life mocked at the dinner table...
Basically what I think. You could either wear the skirt anyways, or you could make some sort of compromise. Wearing ambiguous clothing might work. I find that one-button suits are pretty feminine-looking, for example.
Man. I wish I had the guts to wear a blazer or something. Worst comes to worst, you could always tell her it's a kilt. But seriously. I have to admit, skirts are comfortable. If awkward to sit in for I never got the "sit like a lady" memo. Gender policing, fuck it all. Clothes are just fabric.
Pink dress, red lipstick and a flower in your hair just for good measure. Christmas is about caring for one another. Christmas is a time of peace.
In my opinion, a majority of parents have sacrificed a lot for their children and some have overcome years of social conditioning for the sake of their offspring, so when they ask you to do things that seem unfair... consider it, at the very least. My older sister was the first person in our family to come out as a lesbian. My parents accepted her without question, but asked that she keep it a secret from our very old grandfather. What does my sister do? She came out to our entire extended family (including my grandfather) during a rare holiday gathering. How does she come out? She invites her much older girlfriend, who used to be our art teacher. I'd hate to play devil's advocate in this thread, but there are outfits you would probably be equally as happy with that don't have the same probability of starting a family argument. If the holidays are about "caring for one another," try putting yourself in your mother's shoes and respect her wishes, no matter how unfair and socially backwards they might seem.