What Are You Thinking?

[youtube]IJNR2EpS0jw[/youtube]

I love this. Has a good lesson at the end too.

 

I played this for a music performance a few months ago. :lol:

 

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGErC6QQdoc[/YOUTUBE]

So funny/true. The song starts around 1:57.

 

Now in a complete state of emotional numbness. My mood is set to “Hurt”. But I’m not sure I can say my mood is really anything. I’m asentimental at the moment, if you will.

 

Mom wanted me to make a wishlist on Amazon- fair enough. Don't really like making gift lifts- what I really want's not tangible to put on a list.

Found on her gift suggestions for me, she'd put a Michael Buble Christmas CD. Sure...the thought's nice but since when in the hell do I like Michael Buble? Look, I know I'm hard to shop for and all but I dunno, seems...odd.

 

Stick on a load of trans stuff and nothing else.

 

Or guy stuff. Boxers, razors, shaving cream, aftershave, etc.

 

That too.

 

Man, I wish. List is public though, since lot of family wanted to know what everyone wanted. But hell... I was actually thinking of doing that. :lol:

--

I'm thinking that I'll come out publicly on Facebook via video. See, a status message can be deleted. Changing my gender/name can be backtracked and excused for as a joke. But a video? Not perfect but if enough people see it and they see I mean what I say...

 

Then public be it. You won't gain acceptance until you push this. A vid sounds good too.

 

May have to be drunk before I'd even dare but that's great. :lol:

True... :| Just kind of need to be out of the line of fire before I do. She's gotten on me for just wearing guy clothes, how am I supposed to know what she'll do if I pulled a stunt like that?

 

Come join us. I'm drunk too. Only way to get through this visit with my grandma.

---------- Post added 13th Dec 2013 at 09:23 PM ----------

The more public you go, the less she can mistreat you. You can start posting fb messages of what your mum does, how shit it all makes you feel. Make sure she has the least amount of room to do her shit in.

 

Thing with her though, is that she has a huge social network. Hundreds of people on her FB. I'm just afraid everyone will do what the friends she's told have done and side with her. :\

 

She had convinced them she's fixing you, whatever. Show them it isn't working, that she's making your life a misery. And get to the rest of them first.

 

I don't know if I can do this. :| What if everyone does turn against me and my family turns their backs?

 

I don't believe they will. Your family, and your mother is horribly misguided. But I think that she'll come to terms to when she's forced to, rather than lose you. And if she won't? What kind of life is it if she won't accept you, ever? Its better they know you for you.

 

I can't believe it, I met somebody genuinely humble.

 

I gotta wash my hair this weekend, it smells weird again.

Exams start after Christmas break, but my math teacher saved my butt and I don't gotta write math exams! Woo!

 

ugh, got a new cosplay piece but it's all kinds of damaged so, gotta send it back...ugh!

 

I finally realized this week that yes, I'm gay. Well, yay for me I guess!
Not sure when I'll come out, but I'm not too concerned about it.