How did you react when you realized you were gay?

I was relieved. I'd been out as bi for a while and had a girlfriend before realizing that I exclusively liked women. This explained so much about my previous dating history, and why it had been so unsatisfying. I was so happy to realize I wasn't consigned to a life of unfulfilling relationships!

 

Well there were a LOT of red flags that went over my head, but
I finally realized it after waking up from a dream...
I didn't say anything to anyone all day, just sat there, paralyzed with fear. then, when someone finally asked me what was wrong I burst into tears. I was very confused and upset for a months.

 

I was so relieved.

Suddenly, my love of Victoria's Secret ads made sense.

 

I was honestly confused at first, because I thought boys just liked girls and that was the way it supposed to be. The confusion shortly ended when I found out what "Gay" meant and how my religion doesn't agree with it at the same time at church during the preacher sermon. I then proceeded to deny and repress my feelings until I was 18 when I started confronting them. It then took me around 5 years to figure it all out and who I really was.

 

There was never an exact "moment" when I realized it, but I didn't fully grasp the concept until I was 12 or 13.

 

I suppose I always knew, but I finally acknowledged it on a long car drive on the third of March 2012. It wasn't a big reaction. I just crossed my legs and shut my eyes.

 

i cried...alot and prayed...alot. i would look up quizzes online to try and figure it out. I tried to convince myself i liked guys. It was really difficult for a long time

 

I cried and cried and cried. I disliked myself for not being 'normal'.
I would go online and take quizzes, but they didn't work for me because I kept trying to get results that said I was straight. After trying to convince myself that I was straight, I realized I was forcing myself to do things I did not like. Eventually I accepted that I was not going to change, and that I really did not want to change. This is who I am; it is another piece of me that completes me as a whole.

 

I remember I was about 12 years old, and had a friend, she was 14. One day we were talking about something and i told her that i feel strangely attracted to girls, but i haven't thought of being gay or something, i thought it was just normal, but then she grabbed my shoulders and said "You're a lesbian". Haha, it seemed funny to me, i started laughing and told her that it's definitely not true, but she stayed calm and serious. I remember thinking of it all the evening and night (just after our talk), and after some months i finally realized that it's truth. First i wasn't serious about this thing, i thought it was just because of the starting adolescence, but later i jumped into a depression because "I wasn't normal". It was really hard for me to accept myself for who I am, but now everything's alright and i feel happy ^^ (oh, and that girl who told me i was lesbian, she later became my first girlfriend, and helped me fight my depression ^^)

 

Deny, deny, deny, most of my life. Even when I accepted being bisexual it was still a form of denial. I'm finally okay with being gay. How did I feel? It was a big relief to quit pretending. I felt much more at peace with myself.

 

I had been in denial for at least 17 years. Then there was this moment when the dam broke. I was all "I am SOOOO gay." I freaked out, called my therapist and he was excited about my break though. He said "I know it's hard but it's a happy day." I said "The fuck it is!"

After that I looked back at my life from this point of view and it's really embarrassing how long it took me to come to this point. Because, really, I'm *so* gay. :icon_wink

 

I kinda eased into the idea but at each step was a progressively worse freak out :/ i did the quizzes and denied it for a while...I put myself in a pretty bad place. Then one day I said, "well fuck..."

 

I got really depressed in the beggining... My family is truly homophobic, and i kind like girls since I was 9, but i had a lot of problem to accept it cuz of my family's orientation. I'm still unprepared to talk about it with them, but now i accept myself, then i'm better now.

 

I went.. Oh I like penis.. Okay

 

Did you press the Staple's "Easy" button soon after that?

 

Well, since in my family there was a choice to come home with a boyfriend or girlfriend, it wasn´t weird to realize that would be a boyfriend.
However, I did learn that not everybody is cool with gays and I did keep it within the family up to recently.
But since it didn´t change anything for me in my personal life, it has never been a big deal. Not even a small one. LOL.