Hey! I singed up to this forum a few years ago before I was even out the closet. I forgot all about this place! (!)
I'm nervous and excited about discovering this site! Maybe it will help me feel more comfortable about coming out to my parents. I decided that I had to eventually a couple weeks ago, but actually following through is still really hard. I know that they'll accept without any trouble and we have many LGBTQ family friends, but there is still some sort of block I can't overcome.
There's pretty much nothing to say. Spoiler I'm so bored. But that's neither here nor there — How are you? =)
@Juliette: I was exactly the same a few years ago! This site helped me so much! I know the block you are talking about. It makes you nervous any time you think about it or even try to bring it up. I tried a few times to bring it up but I couldn't. @Luthan: I am kinda bored too. I should be sleeping as I have to get up tomorrow for a shopping trip with my partner. (I just realised it's 4am!!) Other than that, I am pretty good. Just listening to music.
Considering how weird and emotional I feel right now just thinking about coming out, I don't want to imagine how emotional I'm going to be when I actually do come out. I think I'll do within the next two weeks. I'm happy I found this site - coming out anonymously on the Internet makes it feel less difficult to actually come out to my family. BTW, how was it for you when you came out? How did you feel while you were doing it, and afterwards?
Coming out was rather easy for me. My mum and sister kind of forced me to tell them (which I am glad they did) They along with the rest of my family were very supportive. Afterwords it felt very strange them knowing about it. I was so used to being in the closet. I was out of my "safety zone". Within a few days you just kind of realize it's over with and it's time to move on. It's kind of like moving house. You are so used to your old house that when you move it feels very "new". It's hard to explain but it's not bad. Why not maybe leave subtle hints? Those can help quite a bit.
I've left a couple "hints", but nothing nearly obvious enough to seem unordinary. I think that another reason it's so hard is that I've felt my female side strongly and consciously for at least 8 years, but I've had to repress that side in public. It's like you said - I'm too used to being inside the closet. Even after I come out it will take a while before I can actually feel comfortable acting completely the way I feel - it feels too weird. But then again, I'm going to have to get used to getting out of my comfort zone. ---------- Post added 27th Sep 2013 at 11:24 PM ---------- And even though I know they'll accept it, it's going to be HARD to really explain how I feel. Especially since my gender can change as easily as my mood - how can they know when I'm feeling a certain gender? While I know they can't expect this, I do think it will make a lot of sense when I come out. This one secret actually explains a huge amount of my (many) quirks.
Such is life my friend. That's what growing up is all about. You have to get out of your comfort zone sometimes. Granted dealing with sexuality is a bit more challenging than most other everyday "challenges". At the same time. I don't really know what it's like to feel like you do. As in feeling like you are both sexes. I don't have any experience with that. Maybe you could write a letter? It's easier to get how you feel out that way?
I guess explaining how I feel is going to be hard to anyone who isn't some form of transgender. The best way I can explain it is to describe it as having two overarching moods - boy and girl. When I'm in a certain gender-mood, I feel differently, I react to stimuli differently, I have a different approach to things, I enjoy certain activities more or less, I feel different emotions at different times. When I'm in my girl mood, I feel trapped in the wrong body. At best I'm kind of irked, at worst I almost want to cry a bit when I see myself in the mirror. When I'm a boy, I feel fine in my own skin (though I'd like to be taller). As for the letter thing, I wrote something like that in my diary (for example, the diary thing is something my female side really likes, but my boy side doesn't care too much about). ---------- Post added 27th Sep 2013 at 11:43 PM ---------- BTW, thanks for listening to me. Whenever I start something new - like Facebook or this - I get really talkative. Esp. considering how important this actually is.