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4 Weeks since I came out to my parents...

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by GArchi1992, Aug 4, 2013.

  1. GArchi1992

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    Hey guys, just thought i'd take a few minutes to share my experience of coming out to my parents and life since being out to them. So tomorrow Monday 05th August will be 4 weeks since I took the plunge and came out to my parents. And I can honestly say, it was the best thing i've done to date. I decided to write them a letter. I know how interruptive my parents are when I try to speak to them, and I though because it's such an intimate thing to do, I didn't want to be interrupted and thrown of kilter. So I wrote the letter, placed it on my bed and left the house to meet my friend. Literally five minutes later my phone was ringing. 'Home' came up. So i rejected the call initially at first. An hour later and both my parents had read the letter and sent me a text saying...

    "Hi Gareth, as you are aware we have read your letter and wont deny, we have often wondered. Please don't think we are disappointed in you as we feel nothing but pride and will support you with any decision you make. Your happiness is everything to us and as far as we are concerned this changes nothing."

    Now I had to read this twice to make sure I wasn't seeing things. This reaction was totally unexpected and I was prepared for a message along the lines of "don't come home...". I know in the past how homophobic my dad has been. Whether that was bravado I don't know. But he's turned out to be one of the most accepting people in the whole of this.

    Everything has been fine at home and I honestly could not have asked for better parents. I understand that this is not the case for everyone and a lot of people will go through a really hard time with it. One thing to bear in mind though, is to never be afraid of who you are. If people can't accept another persons sexuality then they're not worth bothering about. I wish I had come to this mindset sooner and maybe I wouldn't have wasted so much time worrying about how my parents would react.

    So after 7 years of coming to terms with my sexuality I'm not out to everyone. It's been a long and hard process but I got there in there end. If I can do it (i'm such a wimp) any one can! And I can now honestly say, that I'm truly happy for the first time in years. Feels great.


    Cheers for the support on here guys. Helped me a lot over the past few months. Means a lot!

    :icon_bigg:icon_bigg:icon_bigg:icon_bigg
     
  2. LinkLarkin

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    Your parents sound amazing, many congratulations for finding the courage to come out to them and I'm so pleased for you that it worked out well! Now for the beginning of the rest of your life! (*hug*)
     
  3. Dublin Boy

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    Congratulations Gareth :thumbsup: That is Smashing News :icon_bigg it is always good to hear when a Coming Out goes so well, this will bring hope to other people, thinking about Coming Out (*hug*) (!)(!)(!)(!)(!)(!)
     
  4. person57

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    Congratulations Gareth! I'm so happy that your parents accept you and support you! I'm thinking of doing a similar coming out plan to my parents! Your coming out plan encouraged me a little bit to come out to my parents :slight_smile:
     
  5. Sayu

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    Congratulations! :slight_smile: (*hug*)
     
  6. George

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    Congrats! That's wonderful that they are so accepting. :slight_smile: It's great to see stories like this, demonstrating that many parents react more positively than would initially be expected.
     
  7. GArchi1992

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    Thankyou guys! So happy at the moment.

    I just wanted to share this to show people in similar situations not to be afraid to come out because of how their parents or any one else might react. You never know they might and in most cases, will react a lot more positively than you initially expect.
     
  8. MixedNutz

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    Congrats! You truly have loving parents. :thumbsup:
     
  9. Congrats! It is wonderful how accepting they are!
     
  10. Straight ally

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    Congrats !

    ...

    I always have think that being homophobic is easy when you dont know of anyone gay who you are close to. Why? Because of the fear of the unknown, a situation of us vs them, humans by nature always look for outsiders, and often outsiders are regarded as "the enemy" because is also part of human nature to look for "the threatening stranger" this happens cause in prehistoric times it was necesary to fear any human with different customs as they often where from other tribes therefore natural competitors for food, water and territory.

    But this is easily destroyed when you know for certain someone of your family is gay, it stop being us and them, it becomes "also someone of us". That is why visibility of lgtb is important, the mote lgtb you see on tv or the media or in real life and the closer someone is to them the harder is to hate or fear and the easier to love.

    Actually that transition happened to me: i was soft homophobic (i didnt actively attacked them, and i was teached the "love the sinner, hate the sin" thing.) but one day i met a real-life-bisexual woman and we became friends, and as a i got to know her i changed like this: being gay is a sin-> to "oh, she is gay what a shame but at least she is a good person"-> to "wait, why is this even considered bad?"->to " this cannot be bad at all!"-> to "wuju! A chick with whom i can talk about chicks and understands me!"-> then my usual curiosity kicked in and i decided to investigate everything lgtb related, this changed my mind from passively pro-gay to militant pro-gay, as i started to read about the hardships of coming out , and homophobia and all that, and i started noticing how similar where lgtb struggles to mine but with the extra problem of homophobia.

    And this is the story of how i became a straight ally, also is an explanation of why coming out is very important. Do it! Change people! Break homophobia! :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:ride:
     
  11. jp36

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    Damn, this is inspiring to hear, especially since we have some stuff in common (English, 21, etc.) Massive congratulations, it's great to hear such successful coming-out stories.
     
  12. GArchi1992

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    Thankyou for the comments! Oh an JP, I was down in Brighton a few weeks back. Lovely place!
     
  13. jp36

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    Glad you liked it! I'm not strictly from there, but I live very close, my old school's there and all my mates live there. So it's pretty much where I grew up, and I think of myself as a Brightonian. Great city.
     
  14. Wynter

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    Congratulations!

    I had the same situation as you, and my parent's reactions shocked me. You can finally rest easily! Wooo! :grin:
     
  15. GArchi1992

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    Wynter thank you! Glad that you're parents reacted well also! That's brilliant!