Is my bf hanging out too much with his friend?

I don't have much to say but no you aren't being demanding at all! If he doesn't make time for you then how do he expect the relationship to work? Him playing video games or going to the gym can be substituted for spending more time with you. Also is this friend a male or female?

 

I think you have a right to be upset but he also has a right to spent time with his friend, especially if that is helping him with his depression. Maybe you can plan something for a Friday with more notice, so instead of staying hey tomorrow night want to go out and do something try hey next week...

I think its good for him to keep going to the gym too, that can help a lot for depression but he could spend less time playing video games and more time on an activity you two can do together. Maybe have a calm and reasonable conversation with him about how you miss spending time with him and that while you don't want to get in the way of his spending time with his friend, you would prefer if he paid a little more attention to you. Hopefully you will be able to come up with a suitable compromise for both of you.

 

If he's recovering from a depressive episode he might not be fully aware or capable of recognizing your needs at the moment. He might be comfortable with this Friday meetup as a comfortable routine to help him get through the week.

I agree with Arcane. Calm conversation might enlighten him on how you're being affected with his absence. Hopefully you two can find a balace.

 

i don't think that you have a right to be upset over the fact that he hangs out with his friend every friday. i mean, it's only 1 day of the week and since it's a reoccurring pattern then you should know by now what's going down on friday nights. hanging out with another friend only 1 day a week is nothing to sweat over. but if you'd like a friday night where it's just you and him then maybe you should plan something a week or two ahead that way it's planned and he doesn't go about making other plans with his friend.

however, you do have a right to be mad when on saturdays and sundays he's too busy playing video games to give you any undivided attention. that's a situation that you need to address. when you live with someone, you do spend more time with them than you think. maybe you're just being a little too clingy?

either way, that's for you and him to figure out.

EDIT: it shouldn't even consume half of your day on saturdays/sundays doing household chores. if you just do a little bit each day, you won't have to do too much.

 

You are not demanding at all. Spending time with each other helps the relationship work. Sometimes it just doesn't happen cause everyone is so busy all the time, but several months is no excuse, especially if he has had time for video games.

 

I agree. The video games can definitely be substituted in order to spend time with you. Maybe suggest doing something next time he's in front of the tv/computer.

 

I agree with this. If he was as severely depressed as it sounds, he's probably still recovering, and could just be really enjoying having a friend. If his social life has been as slow as it sounds, he may also, on top of that, just not realize how to balance the two.

So, he's in this mode of making plans. Okay, great - so make your own plans with him. Either designate one night a week to spend with him (I've seen a lot of couples do this with success), or just make the plans as far in advance as is reasonable (I'm not saying months, just as far as you need to).

A calm conversation of "hey, I really wish I could spend more time with you these days" could do the trick. Schedule the conversation if you have to.