What Are You Thinking?

Why is my self-esteem randomly plummeting at a fast rate as of the last 10 minutes???????

 

Another night to drink my fears and loneliness away.

 

Well, not if you live in England. Unless you're looking to start a new custom. Card exchanging brings jobs, tell them that.

Aha, but really. Hey. It'll come. And if not, join us singles at Table 6. We've got chocolate.

 

Lol, just logged into Facebook and saw that my 14-year-old cousin has been in a relationship with her boyfriend for a year. A fucking 14-year-old can keep a man longer than I can. Wow, tonight is just not a good night for my self-esteem, is it? Well whoop-dee-freakin'-doo.

 

(*hug*) Really doubt that but I'm sorry for whatever has made you feel that way.

You, tea, and video games? Sounds alright to me! (*hug*)

(*hug*) If it makes you feel any better- most people I know over here forget. :lol:

 

I feel like I might have had a stroke of good luck this evening! (Well, that may not be the correct way to describe it but it's better than nothing!) So I have seborrheic dermatitis at select locations on my face, and a doctor I saw a year and a half ago said it may possibly have spread to my scalp. I used a lotion for it for a few months but because the "diagnosis" was so wishy washy, I eventually stopped bothering with it. However, now that my hair has thinned so much due to the tellogen effluvium, I can see very clearly that there is actually an awful lot of seborrheic dermatitis going on up there! Which means that the tellogen effluvium may in itself be a result of the seborrheic dermatitis rather than being solely the result of stress, which in turn means that if I start to use this lotion again to combat the seborrheic dermatitis, maybe some of my hair will be encouraged to grow back! I'm not a doctor so can't be sure, but just the possibility is making me feel a hell of a lot more optimistic about the future than I have been doing recently!

 

Something like that.

 

Dear Father:

You are a bastard. A bastard for blasting the ONE song from Les Miserables that I completely relate to: "On My Own" By doing this, you are doing 2 things:

1. When the music is closer, I bawl my eyes out.
2. When it's not so close, I'm being desensitized to something that's fucking tragic.

 

So true!

 

Classes start for me tomorrow.

I'm pretty pumped, but that'll likely change in about four more weeks.

 

We might be even more of a minority! *sighs* :dry:

 

Yup. Agreed.

 

Man I have a mountain of Spanish homework. Geez. My professor is nuts assigning all this. Buhh!

 

Just me venting about what I'm thinking about...

I just told my dad that he's the worst about how him and my mom fight. Sure she says things, but he shows her no respect. Always calling her names and laughing, even when she always asks him not to. He said "You're one to talk about how you talk back." And I told him "Yeah, that's how men in this family are. They show no respect to anyone. That's why half of them had an affair and the other half have multiple kids from multiple women. That's why most of them are liars and thieves." He stood quiet and all I said was, "Sometimes I don't feel related to this family at all. I'm just different than all of you."

I know that's really mean...but it's how I feel. No one in my family shows respect to each other, but they all demand it from everyone. They don't care about who they are married to and really only care about themselves. Even my young cousins might as well be from mars compared to me. I find it hard that I belong to this family, and they ask me why I don't like being called by my birth name.

I know I'm rambling, but I had to type it out on here. It makes its easier not to lose sleep.

 

I'm never going to be seen as a real man, am I?

 

That I'll always be alone and that I could use a hug =/

 

(*hug*)

 

Alright, here you go mate. (*hug*)

I could do with one myself, now that I think about it.