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Boyfriend thinks i'm straight and i'm scared he'll cheat on me with his work friend

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by welshy92, Jul 7, 2013.

  1. welshy92

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    Hey,

    Basically, I am 18 months into my first gay relationship. Before then I dated girls (one girl for 2 years). However I have always questioned my sexuality and about 2 years ago I accepted that I am gay and then got into a relationship with a man. However, because of this my boyfriend thinks I might still like girls or will sleep with girls. This has lead to deep disscussion and I have to him I'M GAY!!! (he has had previous gay relationships) and i'm scared he'll end the relationship because of it.

    Due to my masculine sport that I play and the fact that i'm not completely out means I am straight acting but deep down I am gay!

    Also, my boyfriend has this friend from work who I have met and I don't trust him! Maybe because he openly admitts to finding my boyfreind attractive and says he would "shag" him :dry:! Also my boyfriend is staying around his house tonight and i'm worried that because he thinks i'm straight he might cheat on me with his friend from work! or this boy might make a move on him!

    So i'm asking for advice or something that will give me piece of mind! I know they have both had a drink as well and this friend from work has history of getting with other peoples boyfriends! :bang:
     
  2. LD579

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    Re: Boyfriend thinks i'm straight and i'm scared he'll cheat on me with his work frie

    Your boyfriend should trust you when you say things, and you should trust him to not cheat on you. Likely you both don't have any sort of open relationship arrangement and so hooking up with someone else would be unfair to you. You could talk to him about this, even though it sounds like you've done so before...
     
  3. BudderMC

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    Re: Boyfriend thinks i'm straight and i'm scared he'll cheat on me with his work frie

    Let's make a list:

    - Your boyfriend isn't listening to you
    - Your boyfriend doesn't trust what you say
    - Your boyfriend is hanging out with other gay guys even though you've expressed a dislike for it
    - You don't seem to trust your boyfriend to stay faithful

    Now let me ask you: what about the relationship is making you want to stay? I'm sure there are good parts, but since you've only listed the negatives, I'm inclined to tell you to just leave him already.
     
  4. Dublin Boy

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    Re: Boyfriend thinks i'm straight and i'm scared he'll cheat on me with his work frie

    Why is he staying around this Guys house when he is with you?
    Just out of curiosity :slight_smile:
     
  5. welshy92

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    Re: Boyfriend thinks i'm straight and i'm scared he'll cheat on me with his work frie

    He had a party over his house and had a few drinks so is staying there the night
     
  6. srslywtf

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    Re: Boyfriend thinks i'm straight and i'm scared he'll cheat on me with his work frie

    I wouldn't worry about it until something has happened. If you guess something is going on and are wrong, how's he going to react?

    Innocent until proven guilty is always the right stance.
     
  7. Hexagon

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    Re: Boyfriend thinks i'm straight and i'm scared he'll cheat on me with his work frie

    I have to say I think you're overthinking things. Your boyfriend should be more willing to accept your word about your sexuality, and that needs to change. However, you shouldn't try and control who your boyfriend's friends are. People find each other attractive all the time, and even if your boyfriend is attracted to this guy, if he's a decent person he won't do anything about it.

    I think more than anything, you need to address this problem of trust, in both of you. It sounds like your boyfriend is quite insecure about who you may want to sleep with as well.
     
  8. sexyalex

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    Re: Boyfriend thinks i'm straight and i'm scared he'll cheat on me with his work frie

    I had the same issue with my ex until it drove us apart. LITERALLY. Till this day, i'm not sure if he EVER cheated on me. I just knew he was bisexual, I was his first "boyfriend" and that for 10 months, we have been dancing around the subject.

    Eventually, last december rumor got out that he was planning to break up with me. Frustrated that MY BEST FRIEND was in love with me and that I loved him back. It wasn't true. But the truth was my best friend did understand me better and was always making provisions for me in times when my bf was lacking.

    eg. I'm a vegetarian, my bf is a meat eater. He wants me to stay by his place almost everyday (literally he wanted me to move in) but he never has anything there for me to eat. I tell him what o buy but hen doesn't buy it for he claims he doesn't eat it (which is mean, but fare). So I buy the stuff myself. He gives it away to his friends who he entertains at his house and when I arrive there is nothing for me to consume. My best friend comes over, brings me dinner, he becomes jealous, then starts to complain that I am hard to please AND unwilling to try NEW things....like, dairy milk... *rolls eyes*

    If you want my advice, I say DO NOT leave him. DON'T EVER let him even think or suspect that you are. IT HELPS NOTHING!

    But don't play stupid ether. If your bf thinks you may be cheating on him, then give him a reason not to.

    Rules of A Gentleman: A boy makes his girl jealous, but a gentleman makes girls jealous of what he and his girl has.
     
  9. Rainbow Music

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    Re: Boyfriend thinks i'm straight and i'm scared he'll cheat on me with his work frie

    It sounds to me like you and your boyfriend need to just sit down and talk. And if he won't talk to you, then I think that you should just break it off with him.