What's in a Facebook Friendship?

I'm pretty much on facebook all of the time. I have a lot of my university friends on there. Since it is summer, I talk to them mostly on facebook.

I have a talent of pissing people off on facebook.. I guess they don't like my odd mix of grumpy cat posts and various different posts about LGBT rights and atheism... (I guess this could be because I'm from more of a conservative area of Ohio...)

I ban people from my facebook if they post personal attacks against me. I unfriend people if they are just plain annoying (posting every 5 minutes or something like that).

 

I go there for games, special interest groups and to keep up with my old classmates from high school. I'm not really a chat or instant message person.

 

It bugs me when people complain about Facebook, because most of the complaints are about the people on their friends list. That's like complaining about the printing press because you don't like Twilight. Facebook is a social media website, and any medium is only as good as the content it's being used to convey. If you don't like Facebook, I think the fault lies with whom you add as friends on there, not with the site itself.

Personally, I like Facebook a lot, and I go on there pretty frequently. I've had a lot of interesting conversations on there in the comments section on posts, and chat, though I don't use it frequently, allows me to keep in touch with people easily. And I find it definitely does allow a platform for strengthening new friendships (if they use Facebook often enough, too).

Part of the reason I like Facebook so much could be that I'm ruthless is unfriending or unsubscribing from anyone who detracts from my Facebook experience. Vaguely homophobic? Goodbye. Always complaining and I don't know you well enough to care? See ya later. But I think it's mostly because my friends are quality people, so the "media" that this social media site is pushing through is good.

 

I had people on my facebook that really annoyed me. However, I figured it might cause issues to delete them...so I just removed them from my newsfeed.

Here's the thing - and not that I'm saying you're wrong - Facebook has pulled us into a world where we think we can't have a say in anything. We *think* we must have to put up with all this crap.
We don't. If you can't stand people or what they are doing, just delete them!

I'm at a point now where I use facebook to voice my opinions, post pictures, and talk to certain people. However, a lot of my friends aren't into facebook as much as they used to....which I understand. We are busy! It's definitely changed.

 

I do use Facebook frequently and is the primary method of communication with my friends. Most of the communication however is for planning get-togethers. Every so often, I might be bored at work and text friends just so they can indulge me. But no, I've found Facebook is not a very good means of actually developing friendships. I use it to talk to long distance friend too, but that would be maybe once a month just to check up on them. Not to talk to them daily.

As for people paying more attention to negative stuff than positive. Positive stuff is pretty boring. That's why the stuff about drug addict celebrities is always on page 1 of the newspaper while the stuff about successful charity events might be on page 10 or something.

I find a more productive use of Facebook is to develop your hobbies. "Like" some of your favorite thing to do and often you get updates on upcoming new stuff. I used it to work on hobbies which I then used to get together and socialize and make friends.

But friendship based solely on talking on Facebook? It's bound not to last.

 

This has pretty much been my experience as well. I don't add people I don't know and if the person ignores me constantly I unfriend them. I kinda like playing God like that. I get out my imaginary saber of deletion and just go to town. It's quite liberating. :icon_twis:starwars:

 

I went off of Facebook at the beginning of the year. It consisted of friends when young, current friends, and a big void. The void was high school. I was invisible. It was like a continuation of that. Even though I was a different person with much more confidence at 37 (20 year reunion) I was boxed in to who was I was between 14 and 17. I didn't want to keep living that. I was on it for a year.

If it brings you angst, get off. That's what I did. I feel free!

 

To make a long story short:
Facebook friends are pretty much assholes
the end

 

Facebook friendships are not real friendships. There are people I'm 'friends' with that won't even bother to acknowledge me on the street. There is this one girl in particular who used to be my friend in school but now she doesn't even say hi to me whenever we see each other but writes me fb messages regularly. I don't really understand that.

I agree that stupid messages get more attention than some of the more interesting things but it also depends on what kind of people you're 'friends' with. The idiotic ones will post idiotic things. Or like my mother who always likes and shares 'funny' or 'healthy eating' articles. I didn't exactly blocked her but chose not to receive any of her posts on my wall. You can do that and they'll never know.

Generally I don't bother with posting, sharing or liking anything.
Now I have under fifty facebook friend after deciding to delete the ones I only had because I didn't want any conflicts at school. It sounds stupid as I'm writing this but now at least I don't have to read my bullies' posts anymore.
It's your facebook page, you can do whatever you'd like with it. If you don't want to have certain people on it, you can just delete them and even block them.

I'm definitely not addicted to FB. I sometimes check to see everyday if I've got any messages but mainly to read the updates of pages I follow. Like Amnesty International, LGBT pages, etc.
Also, I'm one of those people whose facebook page is extremely private and sparse. I took advantage of all the privacy settings available.
Basically, all others can see is my wall and my friends (but maybe not even that) and the things I 'like' and 'share' obviously, but these are only visible to my friends.

FB is a good way to keep in touch with old acquaintances or people you've just met. I especially like it because when I meet someone and they ask for my number, I can just say 'sorry I can't remember it right now, but I'm on facebook'. I actually know my own number and if I didn't, it's in my phone but this way, if I end up not liking them, I can always delete&block them but I can't take back my number.

 

Maybe it's different here (different cultures, different lifestyles and all) but my facebook friends (mostly consist of former and current classmates) are very nice. We don't post about politics or religions there (actually one or two post religious posts sometimes, but they're all nice stuff you'd expect from a religion). The majority of posts are pictures, their feelings at the moment, complaints about deadlines, some funny things they just did, etc. Sometimes my friends and I talk politics around the world there because that's our major lol. It's not bad really. They key is not to add strangers or people you don't want in your life.

 

I used to be on FB constantly but now I only bother with it to follow LGBT pages and connect with friends. Why follow when I can't even be myself on it?

 

What's so bad about Facebook friendships? If you're friends with, y'know, your actual friends, it's fine, for me at least. And if someone posts stuff you don't want to look at, you can unsubscribe from their updates or defriend them. But mostly, I don't see why it has to be bad -- just choose your friends carefully.

 

I view Facebook as a popularity contest since people like to add as many people as possible and change their profile pic every few hours. I use mine a few times a week now and I have never posted one single post, I dont see the point in telling everyone what im thinking or doing.

Its only good point is letting you stay in touch with people that live quite far away from you. However this is the lazy way of being friends with people, as it may be used to interact with people instead of being face to face.

 

Personally i am not a person who sticks on a website.There are some expectations of course.But yeah i used to be like that in the past.Like..i had to delete my facebook account to find peace xD.People were baaad..like,some of them deleted me for no reason!Or like i used to have the same taste in music with some people..and when i didnt like that music anymore they deleted me.So yeah..i guess some websites are pretty cool..but i wouldnt like to be on a facebook-like website again.Thats for sure.

 

I don't like facebook very much. But I think that's just because I like using websites like LiveJournal and lang-8 - making more of/reading journal entries rather than statuses. While I don't prefer it, I do have one because it is a convenience in some ways. For example, being able to contact a person I might not be able to otherwise contact, like acquaintances I haven't seen in a while, people in the community, etc. My father recently made a facebook account. He's absolutely addicted now lol It's also a good way to contact cousins/family members that are on the other side of the world.

 

Facebooks kinda OK. It does have some benefits like being in contact with friends and relatives that aren't too close. Its basic social function isn't bad. The worst part is the whole oooh look I've got more friends then you based popularity quest, the other is airing of ones dirty laundry on the site.

 

I don't get all this acrimony towards Facebook, as opposed to the people who use it. As Owen mentioned WAY upthread, if you're careful about who you friend on Facebook, and defriend people who are annoying (or just stop following them in your newsfeed) , then you define what the experience is.

I purposefully try and make my posts somewhat relevant, and avoid things that post on my behalf (or give them permission to post if I must, but only as visible to me only)

 

I hate Facebook. All my FB friends got annoying after a while because they just wrote about such meaningless, uninteresting crap. It got so catty after a while. I just don't need to be bothered with all that.

 

Don't like what someone has to say? Unfriend them. Simple as that.