Hi everyone :smilewave I wanted to ask you something, especially the women on here.. I'm almost at the point where I think that I'll never find a woman who will be romantically etc. interested in me.. Story: Not so long ago I seemed to have a crush on a woman I've known for more than two years now. She's my age. Well, at least I had romantic and sexual thoughts about her, thought about her almost every day for almost more than a year and even dreamed about her some times... I met her almost two weeks ago after a long time (we didn't see each other for more than half a year..) I still had some kind of hope, that she could maybe not totally straight because of some things she said and did a long time ago... But she seemed to kinda reject me indirectly on that day by telling me that her ex-best friend was bi and that this friend has been maybe in love with her/ had a crush on her back then and that she wanted to flirt at her college (we are both students but we don't go to the same university/college), found two guys kinda cute and wanted to meet women (for friendship, to talk to etc. I think). I didn't even talk about my orientation back then... But I could've acted a bit differently around her that day and not only like a normal friend but more like a guy would act around a woman he is interested in or something like that by asking her if she is ok with going there and there or being kinda careful etc... But now I think that maybe I could be there for her in other ways, more friendship ways if she needs me...in case that she would ever need me anyway... My boyfriend and my good friend etc. knew that I was going to meet her and they even know her but I never told my bf directly about my (crush?) on her because I didn't want to hurt him...I only told my good friend and my mum about it.. Most of my crushes seemed to be straight... Another story: In september (more than two weeks before the meeting with her) I met a good friend of mine and a female friend of him (her for the first time). I heard from him that she found me sweet and that I have great hair and great fingers when we talked online...( she still had a bf at that time but I think she would like to try something with a woman, well I know it..and I wouldn't have done something sexual because I'm still in a relationship with my bf) I added her, talked to her online twice and we met one more time with my good friend and some others but I stayed more with him than the other women... One day later or so I found out that I had been blocked by her and I didn't even do anything to hurt her etc... But my friend told her two things or so about me which I didn't really like..I told him about it and he apologized and I told her about a comedian I like because she's really funny if you have her kind of humor...Maybe these were some reasons why she did that... I heard from my friend that she said that I seem to be nice but that it wouldn't fit.... About me: Well, I look like a typical woman, long brown hair, "normal" clothes except that I dress more alternative/metal-like like wearing jeans (dark blue and black ones), T-Shirts (especially black and sometimes even purple ones..and I want to have dark red ones too but still have to buy them, converse, studded belts, studded wristbands (only one at the moment and not one with spikes etc. I don't have one with them), maybe even band shirts etc. soon and I really like these things and don't want to stop wearing them. I have a feminine body but I also like to be a bit more muscular...My arms are a bit trained and I'm really proud of them (sorry if I sound superficial here...) and I want to train my stomach aswell to have a mix of a female and muscular body... I need and like sports so it's a good chance to do that. I think the main problem is my personality...I hang out more with guys at the moment and they don't really seem to have problems with my sense of humor or that I don't really behave like a typical girly girl or woman for example.. I have the feeling that I can be more myself around guys than women...My boyfriend even told me that I come across as tough for example..but I can be a bit shy aswell, quite silly sometimes but also serious and thoughtful and kind/loving and careful... I have negative parts in my personality too but everyone else has them...And we all have our own (little) idiosyncrasies... Guys seem to be more attracted to me than women and if women often go away immediately when I show parts of my personality how will I ever get the chance to show them a more soft/loving side of mine... But as long as I'm in a relationship with my boyfriend I won't have one with a woman or another man. I mostly seem to be interested in straight women or the women who could be interested in women tell me that it doesn't fit...Really great...I'm kinda sick of it...I have been questioning my sexuality for years now and I'm still not so sure if I'm really bi...I occasionally had thoughts about being a guy so that I could have a chance with a straight woman...or why couldn't I have been born as a guy etc... I often read that especially bisexual women seem to like feminine women more and I think to myself: great..I look more feminine but I don't have a total feminine personality so they will be away again immediately... Ok, I'm interested in cute and maybe more feminine women aswell...I seem to be a sucker for cute faces and a kinda sensible and maybe a bit shy personality...But they should be able to take care of themselves too, even if I like to be a kind of protector and just hold them etc... Or maybe even having a really strong friendship with such a woman... The question I have is: Do you think that a woman could ever be attracted to me even if I look like I do and don't have a total feminine personality? Thanks for reading...Sorry for the long post...
Shit, I just saw, that I posted the thread two times..:eusa_doh: Could someone please delete or close the other one? Thank you
I see absolutely no reason why someone wouldn't be attracted to you. Everyone is different and that's what makes relationships so special. As absolutely cliche as it is, I believe there is someone out there for everyone.
Girls could definitely be attracted to you, you just have to meet the right one. If you talk to most gay/bisexual girls they will tell you that mainly they seem to fall for straight girls (whatever their type) and I think that is just because there are more straight girls than bi/gay girls. I have a question back for you, if you did find a girl that you were attracted to, that was interested what are you planning to do?
hmm... good question. I, myself, as a feminine woman am attracted to tomboy/butch; but i do occasionally think about how amazing it will be to have sex with a very feminine girl just vanity wise - its pretty and cute. Also, in movie Gia Angelina Jolie's character was a feminine looking woman that was boyish. It is hot as well. My ex was like that, our relationship shattered because anytime she will start talking about her makeup i would roll my eyes and complain to myself that i should be the only fem one but i see a plenty of feminine couples at work, one being lil bit more tomboy other bein more fem, while both still very fem.
I'm curious, if you are already in a relationship, why are looking for women you are attracted to? I mean, I understand wanting to know who your options are, I guess. But why agonize over this so much when you're seeing someone?
Thanks for all your answers everyone. That was really sweet of you to say. Thank you Don't worry if it sounds clichee because it could be true that there is someone out there for everyone. Well, the relationship isn't going so well anymore...I already thought about breaking up but I can't really let go not yet...He is a nice guy and I'm not really able to leave him yet..I'm still observing the situation...And I don't really want to leave him alone..:icon_sad: If I maybe would really fall in love with another person and I know that the persons loves me back, then maybe I would be able to go...But I'm even not so sure if I could leave when it comes to this... That's a kind of dilemma I'm in...But it doesn't really belong to this topic.. I can't really help thinking about such things....I'm sorry... And I wanted a bit feedback to know if I could have a chance anyway when it comes to women... Well, like I wrote above I'm in a kind of dilemma...I think I would be scared at first but I even had this when it came to guys, so...And since I don't want to hurt my bf or the woman (if I would find one) I think I would try to get to know her a bit first to see if our personalities would really click aswell..And then I think I had to decide and I'm not sure if that would be that easy at the moment...
I kind of think you are looking at things in the wrong way, other people may disagree but from what you have written above it sounds to me a little bit like your relationship is going well and is possibly coming to an end so you are curious about other relationships with girls especially, it sounds like to me you would like to get out of your current relationsip but only if you have another potential one waiting to go into. It sounds a bit like you dont want to be on your own. If you dont love your boyfriend or return the feelings he feels for you then even though it would be really hard the best thing to do is to end the relationship.
Sorry, I haven't been online for a long time... Well, we both ended the relationship in November last year...I had luck because he wrote me and said that he has no really romantic feelings for me anymore but more friendship feelings..So I didn't have to hurt him with breaking up...He still wanted to be friends with me but we don't really have contact at the moment.. I think you were right about that ending the relationship would be the best etc...
