This is something I've been thinking about for a long, long time. For all intents and purposes, I'm 'out' as bisexual...except to family. The only one in my family who knows is my mom (and honestly I probably had no hope of hiding it from her anyways), and she's okay with it, though we kind of avoid talking about it because I can tell it makes her a little uncomfortable. She made me promise to tell my dad before I move out...which is still in a couple years, but I've been giving myself pep talks for the longest time in the hopes I can do it sooner. My dad isn't religious...none of my family is, so that hurdle is crossed at least. But I've casually brought up the subject of homosexual relationships a couple times, and each time hit a wall with him. (On the plus side, my little brother chimes in on my side of the argument so now I have no reservations about telling him at least). I adore my dad. He's smart, kind, funny, and incredibly open-minded. But his arguing points against homosexuality...make no sense. At all. And it's probably the first time I've heard of them from anyone. He is also the kind of person who will debate forever and ever on a subject and talk himself in circles, so arguing with him is pretty-much useless. He says homosexuality shouldn't be allowed because if everyone in the world married those in the same sex (everyone literally meaning everyone) the population would collapse within a generation and there would be no one left. ...And every time we come to this I can't seem to think of anything to say in return, because for my smart, super-intelligent dad, this sounds so dumb and improbable that I can't even believe he thinks it's an issue. Out of all reasons why someone should not like/date/marry someone in the same sex, this is probably way at the bottom of the scale. But I'm so busy trying not to facepalm at him I never know what to say to counter it.
Homosexuality is a minority so there is no way that it will ruin the population. Plus there is artificial insemination so even if everyone was gay then the population would still continue. To me it sounds like he doesn't like homosexuality but can't come up with a valid reason. Like he is avoiding the subject of it. I also think that if you dont feel like you can tell him before you move out then don't. There should be no deadline to it. Its all about when you're ready.
You could explain to him that the global population is well over sustainable levels, and so currently fewer children actually benefits our standard of living. Admittedly, Canada has the lowest population-to-land of anywhere, but ours is still rising do to immigrant families. Second, the queer population has remained constant in proportion as far back as recorded, including where we had to hide in heterosexual marriages, and had large numbers of children. This shows that the current queer population will NOT lead to an increase in numbers, and so it is logically impossible for us to effect world population levels.
I think you know exactly what to say, because you've already said it. "Look dad, I know you to be smart, kind, funny, and incredibly open-minded, but your argument here is so dumb and improbable that I can't even believe you think it's an issue." Then you hit him with facts, like those given to you above. I think your mental block is mostly a result of being hurt by what he is saying. Just remember, no matter what you say or do, never come out to him during an argument. Also, this might be a worthwhile conversation to have with your mother. Explain to her that you're trying to look for an opportunity to come out to your Dad, but every time you try to judge his feelings on the topic, you worry about the consequences.
Hmm...well I don't think you need to worry about him being upset when you tell him, if that's the only reason. Even if you can't get him to change his beliefs, he's not going to be accusing you of trying to purposely lower the population...The earth is suffering from overpopulation right now anyway, and besides, like October said, it's not a huge majority.
