Friends with Benefits

People can do whatever they want. I have no desire to do it, but I couldn't care less if someone else does it.

 

It's not for me, but it works well for some people.

I've spent the past year helping a friend through a Friends With Benefits situation. I told her not to invest emotionally, as it will lead to pain at one point or another. She didn't invest heavily in him, but she was waiting for him to want her as something more, which didn't happen.

So if it is something that someone is considering, just be aware. It does work for a select few people. Just not me.

 

If you had asked me this question two years ago, I would have told you it wasn't for me, that I needed to be romantically invested in a sexual relationship to make it work. But a bit less than two years ago, I met a guy that I've been with an on-again-off-again friends-with-benefits situation for most of the time we've known each other. We both started out with the intention to try to make it work as a relationship, but distance prevented that from happening. We still hang out every once in a while, and when we do, we usually find time to "fool around". And, much to my surprise at the time, it worked for me.

Moral of the story: You might feel differently about the issue when the opportunity is actually presented to you. I'm not saying you definitely will (I'm not saying that at all), but you might.

 

I haven't actually been involved in a situation like that so I can't say definitively, but I don't think I could. This has nothing to do with morals or 'looking down' on people who make it work or anything like that.

It's just that I know myself to be a really emotionally attached kind of guy and I speculate that I wouldn't be able to handle being in a friends with benefits situation.

 

Hmmm. I would say that its not a great idea for a serious relationship, but... There's this one girl I hang out with all the time, we're best friends and we love each other, and we've been fooling around lately because neither of us are in a relationship, we've practiced kissing techniques and cuddled a lot and stuff but that's all it's going to be - we're both pursuing relationships outside of each other. I think it's nice to always have someone you can hug and tell your thoughts to, but our intimacy will stop as soon as one of us enters a serious relationship. I personally like the concept.

 

As long as both parties are open, mature, and aware of the risks, such arrangements can be pretty awesome.

 

a friend with benefits is what i need in my life. :icon_bigg a guy that i can hang out with as a friend and can spend time with when nature calls. for some reason, i think that it's more easier for men to do it than women since men aren't as emotional as women are.

 

No, and I'd rather not be in one. I don't care if others want friends with benefits, but I'm not going to let myself be in this sort of relationship.

 

im fine with friends with benefits, do what you want, if it doesnt effect me it wont bother me,

but i agree with Chouchou, i would feel uncomfortable knowing said person slept around and id like to let my future prospects know that i wasnt like that either, that i was just plain boring date a person kind of guy.

 

Technically it's still cheating but I would mind being in that situation. Just because we aren't boyfriends doesn't mean we shouldn't be able to kiss and stuff.

 

As others have said, if it floats your boat, why not.
I personally though cannot be sexually involved with someone who I don't have a romantic relationship with.

 

I couldn't do it. But if it floats someone's boat, then more power to them!

 

Yep, on and off for a year now, no problems. Good fun. Broke some inhibitions in the process.

 

Never had one... but have always been curious. My problem is that I'd probably end up becoming romantically attached =/

 

not suitable for people like me but suitable for those whom are not relationship material. its good safe sex i guess in the sense that youre not doing random people or cheating on people.

 

I think its fine as long as both people know where they stand. Not sure if i could do it though, i think i'd struggle not to get emotionally attached.

 

what do you mean?

 

No, but I'd like one.

 

I'd like to have one. As Pseudojim mentioned, it would be good to deal with some inhibitions with a friend, with someone I am (more or less) comfortable with.