The other night while at a gay club I meet a guy that wanted to dance, he gave me a kiss on the cheek and told my friends i was cute. I thought he was hot as well and wanted to go dance with him but was to shy to, and then today when out shopping a guy (obviously gay) came up to me and started talking to me but i instantly wanted to walk away. I find myself way to shy around guys its so annoying Im 21 and need some advice!! as these arnt the only times its happened and i would really like to acually get to know more gay guys. I feel most of the gay guys i know are quite permiscuous and open about wanting to sleep with you, i kind of feel out of place. Ive even pashed a few guys so i dont understand why im so shy even alchahole dosnt help
I'm really shy as well. I will probably end up in similar positions as you over the next few years and I question whether my responses will be positive or if I will shy away. However I think the only way to overcome those feelings is to continue to put yourself out there until you feel comfortable with flirting and all that. But I realize its much easier said than done. Maybe you feel uncomfortable acting on your feelings in front of many of your friends? Like maybe it would be easier for you to flirt if there wasn't an audience there. Not sure if that applies or not but I feel it might in my situation. I'm 19 btw.
Are you a virgin? Maybe you are just afraid of sex right now. Or maybe you are comfortable with saying you are gay but not ready to BE gay yet? I hope you figure it out if that's the case. Talking to guys will get easier in time, try being around guys who don't just want to sleep with you, who really want to get to know you as a person. Good luck.
I'm the same - I'm naturally introverted and used to be very shy. But the good news is, as someone pointed out, is that you can work on out. Put yourself out of your comfort zone, and if your shy and don't have any courage, pretend that you have all the courage in the world! I think it's just like public speaking - you hate it at first, but when you practice enough you become good at it. Even if you're nervous when public speaking, you can fool the world to thinking that your confidant and fearless if you act it right. I've found that I've missed a lot of opportunities because I used to be so shy, so I say work on it. As for guys hitting on you in clubs, I feel the same a lot of the time. I'm not one to sleep around so I feel really uncomfortable when a hot guy comes up to me and starts hitting on me - it's flattering, but many (most?) guys just want some quick fun :dry: If you don't want to dance with a guy who is just gonna try sleep with you at the end of the night, then don't... there's nothing wrong with that.
