I'm about to sound really shallow, but here goes: Sex. I can't find an understanding partner to save my life. Shit. I can't go after straight guys because they'll assume I'm a girl. I can't go after other gay guys because I look like a girl. I can't have sex with straight guys because (in my experience) most of them will want vaginal sex which makes me dysphoric. I can't have sex with a gay guy because of my boobs/vagina, plus anal sex isn't top notch for me at this point. So it's either be dysphoric and have romance or it is be alone but not dysphoric. (I suppose dysphoria is actually the underlying cause here, but I really feel like it's been too long since I've gotten any...)
Like you, it's not being able to have my own children biologically. That is the only thing that's difficult about any of this is knowing that if I want a child, I have to pay thousands of dollars and use a surrogate mother. It's all I've been thinking about lately... I need children.
Or you could help out a child and adopt. You know, there are tons of kids without homes. Why make more when there are already too many who need help. This really goes for anyone, not just people of the alphabet soup spectrum. Atti's going to stop getting in everyone's faces now...
The hardest part for me has been, after not once having any desire for a relationship prior to coming out to myself, suddenly really wanting to meet someone. And then realizing that the pool of people I want to date consists of such a tiny fragment of the population that I'll be lucky if that ever happens. I haven't had as many problems with people, but there's still plenty of time for that to change.
Just made a reply to the Politics thread and it made me realize what the hardest thing about being gay is right now. And it's the day-to-day experience of having to put up with some clueless person on TV ranting anti-gay nonsense about how I want to destroy marriage, have sex with dogs, recruit children in schools, or attack freedom of religion. I guess I've been lucky that I've never really dealt with the kind of harsh face-to-face homohpobia. So, for me, it's having to listen to influential people in our world saying these lies about us, and knowing that certain portion of our population is just gobbling it up and luvin' it.
Trying to resist making a boner joke here... teehee ;D I think, probably not being able to express yourself to society.
I'd say coming to terms with it. I've known I was gay for about 10 years and I've just began to accept it.
this x99999999999999 its not the coming out process or the acceptance, its the root of the problem and thats how people see us, its being judged and being made fun of, its about not belonging, its about feeling like you dont belong, its not fair, it hurts. everything comes second to this, its the main reason why we cant accept ourselves for being gay in the first place. why would we want to be gay if it is seen as a bad thing? honey, you will be coming out for the rest of your life, its not a one time thing, it maybe sad at first, but it just gets boring and you dont even feel the need to tell every stranger you walk past your gay either
Well I'm not gay, I'm bi. The hardest thing for me has been feeling like no one will take me seriously or understand, because I'm bi and not gay. I always think if people know then they'll think of me as just someone looking for attention and just wanting to f*** everyone or get attention from guys. I wonder if anyone will ever take me seriously. What has been just as hard is accepting myself. I'm starting to doubt I ever will.
The fact that I've come to terms with it and come out, and really nothing has changed but the way people act around me. My male friends are a little over the top when it comes to boundries, everyone seems to think I'm a sex crazed bisexual who will go for anything with a pulse, and the fact that I still can't find a boy/girlfriend, which is really all I want.
Apart from accepting that neither a girlfriend nor denial will ever change me and so accepting myself (what I already had problems before questioning)... coming out to my parents (still closeted to them, gives me hell)
Other people. The hatred I faced was overwhelming and I felt like some sort of circus attraction. Even now, though I'm out to everyone and very vocal about supporting LGBT rights, I'm still hesitant about actually talking about women unless I'm very comfortable with the person/people - especially in regards to straight guys. Comments that straight people take for granted as okay, like ""Wow she/he's hot" I can't make because straight guys gawk and get all pervy.
I'm not gay - asexual, actually. But I have romantic attraction toward to anyone. The hardest thing was probably having to face my family with it. I never cared about marriage or kids (only saying that because people brought it up and...yeah); it isn't really in the plan, but having to face my family who are believers that liking the person of the same sex in any way is wrong? Yeah, it took a serious toll.
I will have to second you on that. I'm quite sure if I came out at the family church I used to go to, there'd probably be a forced exorcism. I know America is founded on the principles of free speech and ideas, but some people really need a large sock stuffed into their mouths. Or better yet, have their inherent rights taken away or infringed upon solely for being the jackasses they are.
