Dear Mom, I need to tell you something very important. I am gay. This was not caused directly OR indirectly by you, and need not feel “guilt” or sadness for “making me gay” since like Lady Gaga said, I was born this way. I’m clearly not one of those stereotypical gay men; you probably won’t see me wearing sparkles or make-up anytime soon I am Phillip, and don’t let me being gay change your view of me; I’m the same person I was before I told you, just gay. I’ve known since around 7th grade that I liked boys, and I never thought I would act upon it. I was basically trying as hard as I could to force myself to like girls. However, none of the things I did worked. In fact, it made things worse; it only made my feelings for men increase. So in December, after being fed up with all of the effort I put into faking being straight, I finally accepted that I am a homosexual. I came out to one of my close friends, (best frahnd evar), in April, and many more followed. Now I am out to most of my friends, some people at camp know, and by the end of Sophomore year I’m sure the whole school will know. I’m telling you just because I’m so tired of the hiding who I am; and to be honest, I am happy that I’m gay. It’s given me a new and amazing amount of self-confidence that, if I was straight, would most likely not have, or wouldn’t have it until I was much, much older. I hope that this doesn’t let anything change in our relationship and friendship, Mom. I love you so so much, and I can only hope that you will do the same. P.S. Don’t tell Dad, I’m going to tell him in due time. Don’t tell the rest of the family, either. (Sister) knows. ~Your son, (cute family nickname here) _______________ Planning on giving this to her tonight... wish me luck
Looks like a good letter. Especially because it was written by you, so it sounds like you! Have you given it to her yet? How did it go? Just one thing, if I was your mum I would freak out by the sentence: " by the end of Sophomore year I’m sure the whole school will know", because if I was a mum I would worry that not everyone would be accepting. But I'm not your mum so I don't know how she will take it. Good luck!
So I told her. At first she was like "You are NOT gay." And then she kept reading and was like "How do you know?" and I was like "well... you just know. Like, I can't explain it" and she was like "...well, I think that you're too young to put a label on it. If you are, that's fine. If you're not, that's fine as well. You're too young to let it weigh on your mind this much" and I was going to retaliate and stuff, but then my dad came up and it just sorta ended then. She's not going to disown me or anything, but it's not exactly the reaction I wanted...
Its not the best reaction, but its definitely not a horrible one either When people come out at younger age it sometimes takes the parents a while to understand that sexuality is something that people are able to tell from a young age. Try to understand her view and just reassure her that you are sure is not a phase or some sort of confusion. With time she will come around. Until then try to not convince her or fight her about it, just be you and that alone will help her see that it doesn't change you in any way. Either way, congrats on taking the plunge! Looks like you are getting closer and closer on being completely out
Well, first congratulations on telling your mother (*hug*). Now I understand that she didn't have exactly the reaction you were hoping for, but she didn't had a bad reaction either. You're still very young and your mother probably wasn't ready to think of you as a sexual being yet. Give her some time, she will come around. I forward you a link to a Pflag booklet that you may want to give her : http://www.pflag.org/fileadmin/user_upload/Publications/Daughters_Sons.pdf I hope this could be helpful. Take care (*hug*) Cécile
You're only 15. It's not unreasonable for your mom to think you might be confused, however, we know that you're not confused. It's hard for straight people to understand fully what it takes to come to terms with your sexuality. It's a unique experience most people don't have to go through. You just need to give parents some time to come to terms with it too. It's not an easy process but it's something that they need to go through too!
my mom had the same EXACT reaction- not satisfying at all. but we just gotta wait this out- they'll come around someday.
Wow, yeah, my mom tried to tell me that I'm going through a phase and I have no idea what I'm talking about. So I basically just dropped it. I'm planning on bringing it up again or maybe sending her a letter once I'm at college. It's kind of a letdown, yeah, but it's also not the worst possible reaction. Just give it time.
