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Porn

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by angel424, Jun 25, 2011.

  1. ArcaneVerse

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    Oh I think we did state that not all those who say they are feminists are the crazy type, just the majority appear to be. It is hard to have any sort of discussion without generalising a little though huh? XD.
     
  2. GhostDog

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    You gotta be careful with phrases like "the majority". How do you quantify that? You can't; it's all in the people you have come across. Maybe most of the feminists you've met are nutters, but I have gone to GSA meetings, feminist meetings, and know a lot of feminists. And of the self-described feminists I have met, very few of them are actually anti-male (including me, and I'm even a lesbian). I don't know about anti-porn, but the "men suck! boogabloobloo let's have a matriarchy instead! down with men!" sentiment is not something I have come across much. But that's my own personal experience. My hometown seems to be a hub of reasonable feminists, but I don't live everywhere, so I can't say that's the case everywhere. I can't hesitate a guess as to what the "majority" is like because I haven't met them.

    I don't know if the porn industry is degrading to women (or men). The people in it certainly volunteered for it. I think its real danger is in setting a standard so high that most people can't possibly hope to measure up. I can't say much about the men in porn, because of the small amount I watch, I don't watch anything with men in it. But these women are almost always perfectly smooth, have occasionally had surgery to make their downstairs more attractive (i mean, come on, everybody looks weird there, it's just a weird part of the body), and act like, well, fantasy fuel. Which it is, and that's fine. But if the average Joe or Jane is expecting the other average person to match up to that, they're going to be disappointed. There's going to be clicking teeth, or a fart, or maybe the girl you* hooked up with is not cool with that trick you picked up from Big Booties 12, and that shouldn't ruin it for you. And you definitely shouldn't try to make it happen, even though that girl in the video was totally cool with it even though she said "no" at first. (Also; I don't believe porn by itself instills the idea of women as an object to be manipulated. If you've already got that idea in your noggin somewhere, it'll definitely reinforce it, but porn by itself is only one of many factors that can go into creating an abusive asshole.)

    *This is a generic, universal "you", not... you.

    Porn... shouldn't ruin relationships. Porn addiction could, just like any addiction, or porn instead of actual sex definitely could, but if moderate porn watchin' breaks a couple up, I don't think there was enough communication going on. (Granted, with the "eww gross" attitude a lot of women admittedly do have towards porn, I can see straight guys not wanting to share, but other people have made good points about it being a good way to see what your partner likes.) If your partner feels inadequate because you watch porn or something, then the two of you just need to sit and have a frank discussion about it. Why you watch it, why they feel upset, how you two feel about each other, and maybe even how it could be worked in to your sex life as a couple. Or something, I don't know. I can definitely see how one half of a couple feeling the need to hide something like that causing a lot of tension when it's eventually discovered.

    The main problem I have with porn is because it's painfully obvious that most lesbian porn is made for men. I mean, c'mon. Long fake nails? Ow. I know it's all staged and isn't meant to be 100% realistic, but it reaches a point where it is so painfully obvious that I am not actually the target audience that it bugs me. (Thankfully, there are a few studios that shoot girl/girl porn for women, and IMO it's much better, but there's not a whole lot of it.)

    ... This is the most I think I have ever written about porn. Huh.
     
  3. Pseudojim

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    Heyya Helen, if it's not against the rules, could you please PM me some of these female-friendly forbidden sites? =D
     
  4. ArcaneVerse

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    True you cant really measure "the majority" but I did say earlier that I think a lot of it has to do with the nutters overshadowing the normal ones XD and that you cant help but generalize and what not in these types of discussions.

    I think though when people read "the majority" they automatically think the person is saying "there are only a few of the opposite", not saying this is what your doing just making an observation.

    +1. I guess women also would have a reason to hide their porn, especially if it was about oversized man bits, their partner might feel inadequate. Didnt think about that before.

    Yeah I cant stand most lesbian porn, maybe its because I'm mostly gay, but it does seem really bad. There does need to be more porn made for women but it does seem to be a very small market and what with "illegal" downloading and everything company's aren't going to want to take that risk. Even most of the straight porn in horrible, I can only seem to tolerate certain gay porn, its just so over the top.

    Seriously though if they ever make really good romantic porn...
     
  5. Mogget

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    I self-identify as a feminist.:smilewave I hang out on a a number of feminist blogs and most of them aren't male-hating or nutjobs in any way (there is one horrific radfem site I stumbled across once, there are nasty feminists out there, you can usually ID them by asking them if they support trans people). And plenty of them are pro-porn and -prostitution (in non-exploitative circumstances); they're called "pro-sex feminists."

    As for porn, there are serious problems with exploitation and (even moreso) health in the porn industry, but ultimately almost all the participants are voluntary and of age. I've heard that watching it can lead to degrading attitudes towards women, but I've also heard that countries where porn is legalized tend to have their rape and sexual abuse rates drop. Ultimately, I don't think the objectification angle is valid as the participants have chosen to be objectified.

    I also find it interesting that very few anti-porn activists (on the left, that is), have anything to say about gay porn.