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Gay Jokes

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Justindee13, Mar 30, 2010.

  1. SRSLYMARK

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    I usually laugh it off, but deep down, I think it's bullshit. I really hate categorizing/stereotyping people, and even light-hearted comments kind of fuel that. But there really isn't a ton you can do about it, I've noticed.
     
  2. Rikudo

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    I've been having this problem recently as well. However I'm not out and don't really want to come out yet so I'm kinda in the position where I have to go along with it. Also being what you would call a "jock" I hear the constant gay jokes and slurs all the time. I'm also guilty of throwing around homophobic slurs a lot. But I'm trying to not say it as much.To be honest I'm not offended and there is basically no other gay people here. But recently I've been thinking how will people react when I come out. Because everyone says something homophobic from classmates to fellow teammates even coaches through out slurs.
     
  3. xCrazyInsanity

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    calling something gay; no

    a well thought out, witty joke, using homosexuality as the butt of it; i'm ok with that.
     
  4. Chip

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    Maybe you should working on being more versatile, so your friends can be butts too :slight_smile:

    (Sorry, couldn't resist...)
     
  5. I don't let it get to me. I mean, would i prefer to be called something other than faggot? Yeah. But most of the time, the people who say it, are people i don't care about, and their opinions don't matter to me. So i just brush it off.

    And i think most gay joke are very funny. Even when a straight guy puts on a very effeminate voice, i think its funny. Guys in school did it all the time, and it never offended me.
     
  6. Dr Acula

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    The only time it annoys me is when either straight people are acting incredibly gay and then get very uncomfortable if you (as a gay person) join in some banter - my opinion is often don't talk the talk etc.

    Otherwise I don't really care if someone goes "oh that's so very gay", I do it myself sometimes. I'm pretty relaxed about everything and can fairly easily shrug off a bit of light ribbing from friends, although I may not tolerate someone being directly abusive towards me because of my sexuality.
     
  7. Vivi

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    I find it depends on who's saying it. If it's close family/friends it doesn't really bother me - I know them well enough to know they don't mean anything by it. If it's someone else, I might be a bit annoyed (depends on what they say) but I try not to let it bother me.
     
  8. To me its all a matter of context. I can usually tell if someone is being hateful. If someone is being hateful and I don't know them I just look at the person and make a mental note that the person responsible is an idiot.

    When I was younger and retreated to my fortified closet I was very homophobic and would say what I thought people around me wanted me to say. I would say things are gay or someone is a fag in an attempt to show people I'm not gay. These days when I ever hear someone acting in the way I did I understand what might be going on in their head.

    Here and there these days I will say something is so gay when referring to myself in a joking way. When I do that I'm just having fun with stereotypes. My best friend has caught on and plays with it also. Sometime this summer when we go backpacking I'm totally going to ask him to go get a fagot because I'm cold.:grin:

    I also want to use the word dike someday. Maybe if I go to New Orleans I can yell "Look at that dike over there!"
     
    #28 prismaticlight, Mar 31, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 31, 2010
  9. gaius

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    I gave my brother a slap round the back of his head for using fag to mean bad, but if someone is joking on, such as when a mate shouts "stop staring at my arse! i know i'm good looking but i'm shy" then im laughing away with them
     
  10. justcrosby23

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    As long as they're joking I don't really care.
    I sometimes say stuff like "that's so gay" once in a while so I can't really get pissed about it
     
  11. Markio

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    "What do gay horses eat?"
    "HEEEEYYYYY!!"

    I like telling that joke, but only to people who already know I'm gay.
     
  12. Camman3

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    It can be very irritating...

    I recently realised I'm quite a hypcrit because I love to say "Oh my god". I realise that's probably just as offensive to deeply religious people as the offense I take to gay slander. I would have less of a problem with joking about it if the stigma of "gay" and "effeminate" were less strongly connected. People who are confused about their sexual orientation will be lead to believe they aren't manly (men)/ are too manly (women) and these insults can really play on their minds.

    When I saw the following picture when I was still figuring out that I am gay, it played on my emotions a lot. It made me feel bad for having feelings for guys and made me feel emasculated.

    http://images.google.co.za/imgres?i...&ndsp=18&tbs=isch:1&ei=5Bm2S96KF9uX4ga9z_GxDg - It had the caption "You may not be this gay... but DAMNIT you're trying hard!"

    Because these comments and photos make people feel that being gay is bad, I am very anti gay-jokes. A lot of the time people say it without being aware they could be hurting someone, so I try make a witty comment following, or just tell them flat out that it was insensitive of them to say that.

    I forgot to mention that it's quite cool that me and my friends that I am out to can joke about it, but only because it's an open topic. Kind of like the word "nigger", but only gay and gay-friendly people can use it >.<
     
    #32 Camman3, Apr 2, 2010
    Last edited: Apr 2, 2010
  13. chiboi15

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    Depends on the context, the intent of the person, and the level of intimacy, trust, and acceptance.

    I'm comfortable with my roommate; we trade porn and we'll crack gay jokes back and forth with each other from time to time, but we're both mature enough and trusting of each other enough in the privacy of our apt that we can. Certain other people, no way!
     
  14. malachite

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    more the faggot thing then just gay jokes, like someone saying: "that's gay"
    But when someone calls someone a faggot because they've done something they don't like.
    I have found that if you fill your utility belt with fun come back you can shut people up pretty quick.
     
  15. mydogstewie

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    I hate, "that's gay"
    I hate, "faggot"
    I hate, "fag"
    I hate, "cock sucker"
    I hate, "queer"
    I hate, "homo"
    I hate, "homofag"


    Done.
     
  16. remow49

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    Hearing "that's so gay" or "you're so gay" doesn't bother me all that much. I mean, in the nasty contexts, yes. But I just think that it's unfortunately become a natural saying in our society that's okay by most people. No one thinks of what it really means when they say it, they probably don't even know what it means in context to other people. However, the more I come out and the more people say it, it does start to bother me more and more. Especially if a straight friend says that about a person they don't know on the street that is obviously gay. Then I become a bit angry because I think the person is just degrading the other just because of their sexual orientation.

    So, for me it's an on and off kind of feeling. It just depends on the context that it's used in and who says it. But I think society should come up with another term to use for "stupid" or whatever else it signifies.
     
  17. Sesshomaru

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    Although it does sometimes bother me when a person says it around me, it's usually 99% of the time one of my straight male friends which I easily fix by saying "Is there something wrong with that?" or a light punch to the ribs. If I don't know the person completely though and they yell out something like faggot then yeah, I'm ready to break a few bones. One of the girls I hang around occasionally let's out a "Omg you had a gay moment!" since I don't fit any of the stereotypes or a "That was so gay!" but I never get even the slightest bit angry since the day she means it in an offensive way is the day hell freezes over.
    Though, I have started getting sorta irritated and angry with the sudden rise of straight guys acting completely gay to fit stereotypes just to laugh at each other. Being myself though with my freakish veins and all normally stops all acting within a few seconds after a angry glance but I can only imagine how other might feel having to deal with this =/
     
  18. rachob1

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    Where I work we had a couple young lads that started work for us and would occasionally use the "that's so gay" comment, but where immediately pulled up on the comment, and now those two lads are among the first to correct other people, and half the time the comments haven't offended those of us that are gay, but our straight colleagues have taken offence on our behalf. It's fun, sometimes to see just how pissed off they get at a gay joke that one of us has found funny.