Does Anyone Think That Gay Pride Parades Just Perpetuate The 'Gay' Stereotypes?

Look, I'm really not trying to be rude or anything but I don't think it makes sense at all to come to a LGBT support site and sort of target a certain group/groups that may be and ARE a part of the site too, this IS homophobia, putting a certain type of homosexual or bi person above another type of LGBT. I know you won't change your opinion but openly offending people isn't the right thing to do at all. and don't say that they're not offended, or that they deserve the attention they are getting or that they are misrepresenting the LGBT community. I'm more or less conservative, yet a lot of people have A LOT of negative thoughts on the conservatives and the Republican Party which is why I'm Independent. the same goes for Liberals too (i'm not trying to start a political discussion here, just giving an example). There will ALWAYS be misrepresentation in a group of people because EVERYONE is different and EVERYONE is an individual. Be happy that theres any attention at all to LGBT rights... seriously dude, its not worth the negative feelings toward you to just call out a whole group of people. :eusa_naug

 

Okay but its VERY vague, they're not agreeing to the extent that you feel. Regardless of what your intentions were, people WERE hurt.

 

It still seems to me your saying "Im ok with flamboyant gays as long as they march in a number accurate to there proportion to the overall gay community and as long as they are not being shown in the media" and if your not, well then maybe you need to re-word some things?

Like lex said before, if the media does not find flamboyant gays at the parade, they will go take a few shots of them down the street in a bar. Why? Because thats what the grey on grey on grey on grey wife and two kids heterosexual white people WANT to brand you as, like it or not. If you dont want to be branded as a drag queen or something, then you can ONLY do one thing: Change other peoples opinions about you by yourself.

 

I don't think Tazz is necessarily against people who do it, but more curious on why people wear leather and wigs for one day of the year to celebrate being themselves when they wouldn't wear it any other time of the year and it enforces stereotypes (Please point out if I'm wrong here ).

The truth is, it's fun. That's it. At parties, even straight people like to dress up because of the fun atmosphere. And gay pride is really just a big celebration, so people go all out to enhance that atmosphere as much as they can. Some wear wigs because they do all year round, some do it for the fun of it. And for some reason certain bigoted straight people see it as a confirmation that "they're always just celebrating and wearing leather".

I've been to a couple of prides, and each time I've worn some silly hat. It doesn't mean that I wear it 24/7, but it just adds a little bit of "zing" to my celebration, a celebration that I'm happy with who I am.

What I always think, is that at pride parades, if someone closeted walks by, I want them to think "Oh that lesbian is happy, she's celebrating and she looks like she's having a good time, even though she's gay. Maybe I'll be happy with myself at some point too".

 

Pride parades arent worthless in my mind. it is a way of pointing out that we are here, and we are not going to disappear.

However, some people take it to far. is it the drag queens? nope, they cross dress because that is what makes them comfortable about themselves. We should be supportive of them. However, that doesnt mean others will take it the same way.

One of the first things my mother asked me in the days after she learned I was gay, was if I felt like a woman in a man's body. She wasnt trying to stereotype, but she wanted to be sure.

There are people who equate such things with homosexuality, and there are some, unlike my mother, who would try to use it against gay people.

The problem with pride parades are not those who are here to say that they are gay, not ashamed, and not going to disappear. It is those who just dont get it. Just because you are gay doesnt mean you need to run around in a gstring or leather hot pants with whips and riding crops and other BDSM impliments, throwing that in other peoples faces.

What frustrates me about that is that it is inappropriate. you wouldnt walk down the street wearing such things any other day then a pride day. you would get ticketed for indecent exposure, because its not appropriate behavior for public.

And people take it badly, and they use it as ammo to justify anti gay movements.

It is one thing to wave a rainbow flag, or wear a t-shirt with a slogan. It is one thing to cross dress, because you fill comfortable doing so. But dressing up like a BDSM addict, and grinding against a lamp post while moaning *which i have seen people doing at pride parades* is something different.

If you want to endear yourself to others, act like a civilized person.

 

Yes, yes, yes, yes... YES!

I think pride parades are great, they really get our message out, and let people know that we will not be housed in a theocracy. However, the people at pride wearing BDSM and grinding against lamps (lol), are a detriment to our cause. This causes people think, "Oh god, those homos are so promiscuous!" Then it prompts them to stereotype us all as a bunch of leather-wearing, lamp-humping, who-yas.

I think we need to have an equal mix of corporate, suit-wearing people and drag-wearing flamers.

 

Wow, 24 hours later and this thread is still going strong so I'll pipe in again.

I said this before and I've been thinking about it more. Someone could say that the increase in attendance at pride and the fact that kids are coming out younger is just the general liberalization of society, and that the "over-the-top" elements of pride parades actually are slowing that process down. But I'd say that it IS the more outrageous people who march at pride parades that give it that extra vitality that keeps everyone coming and watching and yes I suppose, arguing. And that's a good thing - maybe the whole "there is no such thing as bad publicity."

Well, while this is such a small minority of attendees, I doubt it makes any kind of difference. The ammo used to justify anti gay movements is not BDSM's grinding against lampposts :lol: but homophobia rooted in religion that simply hates people who love the same gender.

There is

 

And I occasionally wear a bondage collar out in public. Why? Because I like to. It feels right, especially if my boyfriend has locked it on me. The shock value is just an added bonus, because it really is something to see some of the expressions. And believe me or not, they're not all bad reactions, either. I've had a few different people ask me quite at length about where I acquired whatever collar I'm wearing (especially the steel spiked one).

Sure, shock value might be part of it. But, it's not the primary or motivating factor. You have to be comfortable with what you're wearing or doing in order to do it, and the shock value is just an added bonus for some. If I wasn't comfortable wearing a collar out in public, I wouldn't do it, plain and simple. The same goes for cross-dressing and the like. If they weren't comfortable doing it, they wouldn't do it. If he wasn't comfortable being a drag queen, my friend in Toronto would not spend two hours getting ready and then go on stage, even if that one show would pay his rent for the month.

 

:roflmao: I love that Janvier! I've had a great time at Pride parades! Personally I think the drag queens make the parade! Yeah, some of it is pretty sexual and that is what usually gets on TV or in the newspaper giving the parades a bad name. But, my gosh the same thing happens at Mardi Gras! Its not any different.

What people usually don't see in the newspaper or on TV, is the gay sports groups, the gay advocacy groups, welcoming congregations, and PFLAG! I've written to news sources before encouraging them to get some pictures of these groups when they cover Pride. Its just more fun to put a picture of the drag queen, you know?

 

But, as said, there is. If anything, there already are more of the suit-wearers. And even if they would be made into educational dioramas, with a perfect societal cross-section of all gays, all you would see on the news would be the flamboyant people anyway. And if they wouldn't be there, it's highly likely that the haters would take other footage or stock footage. Nothing, short of the elimination of all footage of drag queens, ever, will stop some tv station from flashing those "promiscuous" images.

Not to mention that you can't exactly make them a closed system. What are you going to do about it? Have separate entrance lines for "normal" and "fabulous" gays, and only let one "fabulous" one in every few "normals" you get? That would be the exact opposite of what it's all about.

 

I'm not sure, I know sometimes it's does nothing but hurt, but sometimes it also helps A LOT. I really wish I could have voted "sometimes both", but oh well.

 

Well, I think this thread maybe has run its course. It's been a good one I think. Hey, it even got shut down for awhile and reopened which is always fun

But what would be interesting to me is to know how the poll breaks down in terms of age. Because based on the comments people have left, it appears that the vast majority of "Helps our Cause" are over 20 (like me), while the "Hurts our Cause" group tends to be the teenagers. I know there are exceptions with some of you, but it's been a pretty clear correlation--at least in the comments.

 

i think pride parades are great and so much fun. i have so much admiration for people (whoever they are, or whatever their orientation) to express themselves in a way that is so against the "norms" that we are presented with every day.

you have to admit though, that there are are gay people who fit the description of a member of mainstream society in ever respect except for their orientation. my parents have so many gay friends who work in an office and have quite dinner parties on the weekends.

the pride parades don't represent every gay person's idea of pride, no matter how fun and inspiring they might be.

 

that really is an interesting correlation, and it kinda makes me wonder what the underlying factors behind that are. One could sugges that the under-20 crowd struggles more with self-acceptance, so they're more inclined to view drag queens and Pride and the like more negatively. High school is known for the culture of conformity, and those who stand out in any way tend to have a much harde time of it, if they're not just ostracized outright. Conversely, those of us who are older have experienced more, more discrimination, more acceptance, and more of life. We've generally moved past that phase where we so heavily rely on the acceptance of others for our identities, as by this point we've experienced enough to have a very solid grasp on ourselves as people and can forge our own self-identities. Part of that self-identification is being able to be ourselves without having to worry about our own images being "dragged down" by others around us.

 

I have a bit more, but the battery on my iPhone is about dead... So more later