Corrupt A Wish

Lol toenail clippings ewww!!!!!!

Granted, you will be amazing at talking about your feelings, but the rest of your communication skills will be singing. Order a pizza? It will be a musical with you from now on!!!

 

Awesome! I love singing!
Side note, you forgot to make a wish.

 

Ooo dangit, I forgot a wish indeed ! Why are you singing by the way ? awesome song ? Is that a new Sia song?? Sia - Awesome wish forgetting

My wish is.....that racism will disappear !

 

What a noble goal...Granted, but sexism gets incredibly worse as a result.
I wish I could bake. Cupcakes, cake, pie, cookies, etc.

 

Granted , but whoever eats them becomes gluten intolerant.
I wish I had a personal pizza restaurant.

 

Granted, but the only oven in the restaurant is an Easy-Bake.
I wish my migraine would go away.

 

Granted, it has been replaced with an ulcer.
I wish I had something better to do.

 

Granted, now you can do nothing but talk to suicidal cancer patients.

I wish I was a master of stand-up comedy.

 

Granted, but all your jokes are really offensive in one capacity or another, so no one hires you.
I wish I had time to do everything I want to

 

Granted. Someday. Lazy, I know.
I wish people weren't such idiots, I mean WHY WOULD YOU WALK INTO TRAFFIC?

 

Granted, people are no longer idiots, all people are now all sadistic geniuses bent on causing the cruel death of all around them.

I wish I could end the arms trade worldwide.

 

Granted, you are known for ending the arms trade, but also for starting the slave trade again
I wish for a banana, just one

 

Granted, but it's in a perpetual state of rot and reappears in your kitchen whenever you try to get rid of it
Oops, almost forgot to make a wish. I wish it wasn't so easy to make typos on phones

 

Wish granted, but your phone only works on voice dictation now and replaces every word with rude and offensive language.

I wish i had some more money and time...

 

Granted, you have an extra 20 years to live and 10,000 euros per year, but everyone around you has 10 less years to live and 10,000 euros less per year.

I wish I could think of more creative methods of corrupting wishes.

 

Sure but every wish you corrupt make becomes uncorrupt thus causing it to be invalid.

I wish i had god like powers.

 

Granted, but only over an infinitesimally small area of space-time.
I wish my grades were better

 

Granted, your grades improve by 1%
I wish people would stop saying things like "triggered" and doing things like "dab"

 

Granted but animals would start doing things like the "dab"
I wish I was a Astronaut.

 

Wish granted, but once you are in space you can never go back to earth, thus you will be floating around in space forever.

I wish someone would make me breakfast right now