I am not great at writing so please bare with me. Also not sure if this is the ideal forum where i should be posting this. I am almost 60yo and biologically male, i am attracted to femininity. I am now at a stage in my life where i can dress femininely within the boundaries of my home as family has grown up and left home. My wife helps with this and doesnt mind. However, dressing up does not feel enough for me i want to go on HRT. In my head i am both Male and Female. I have always been drawn towards being female from an early age and as a result was pretty much a loner growing up as society never treated people who were different very well. I have suffered from mental health problems 40 years+ part of which was down to me having to play a masculine role all through my life. Is 60 too late for starting HRT ?
Scottishxxx.....Hello and a great big LGBTQIA+ welcome to Empty Closets! I can remember the first post that I made on EC. I was desperate for help and I got the help that night that I so needed. I hope that we can help you in the same way that I received help. The most important thing to remember about Empty Closets is that we do care about you! We're very glad that you found us here on EC and hope that we can answer questions, give you support and provide a place to vent (as long as it's not violent!) when that becomes necessary! *****It's never too late to become who you really are! However, I would suggest that you have a chat with your doctor first. You would need to anyway in order to go on HRT. The doctor would most likely want to do a complete physical exam to check your health before trying anything like HRT. I am proud of you for wanting to reach for and accomplish your dream no matter what your age is! You might also want to checkout some MtF & FtM transgender youtubers. Here is a short list of ones that I have watched: MtF Victoria Rose Riley J. Dennis Renna Williams Alexamarilla Robin jaspers FtM Alex Bertie. Jammidodger. Noah Finnce. Luke Wale. Sam Collins. Ty Turner Dakota Aspen I do hope that this helps a little bit! The rest of this post is some info on how to navigate part of Empty Closets: *****There are 18 different sub-forums here that you can check out and join in the conversations or start your own thread/conversation. In particular you may want to check out the forum that is titled "Gender Identity and Expression”, there are a lot of people there who have dealt with some of the same kind of issues that could be challenging you. When you have made at least 10 posts on various threads you will be able to post messages on a member's Profile Page. Just click on a member's Avatar Picture and then click on "Profile Page" in the dialogue box that pops up. You'll then be on their Profile Page and there will be a box that says: "Write Something" When you have been on EC for a few weeks and have made at least 50 posts on various forums, you can apply for Full Membership. A Full Member can send Private Messages (PM) to other Full Members and share personal contact info. Right now you can only send a PM to a Staff Member as that is always possible. Here is a quote from the Full Membership information forum: *****To be eligible you must be a member of Empty Closets for a minimum of two weeks, and have a minimum of 50 posts. These posts must be across numerous forums (Fun & Games does not contribute to post count), and consistently posted across a minimum of two weeks. You wouldn't be eligible, for example, if you registered, had no activity for two weeks, and then returned to post 50 times on your 14th day of membership. *****Well, as I said, we're very glad you found us! If you have any questions at all, you can post a question on my Profile Page or send me a Private Message. .....David
Hi Scottishxxx, in a word - no. In fact, there is someone in the trans support group I go to that has just had surgery at the age of 72. I'm 52 myself. I only faced up to myself and the fact I'm transgender aged 50. We only have one life and with so little time we owe it to ourselves to live it in the way we want to. Beth x
Cool. Do you think that would help you feel a little better? Are you nervous about the Dr's appointment and the whole process? You're going to get some information. Knowledge is power.
I'm scared because i feel i wont be taken seriously and the effect that rejection would have on my mental health.
It's hard not to worry about what people think, but I think more people are becoming open minded. If they don't take you seriously, it's on them, not you.Remind yourself of that. I think you will be successful in finding advocates who will take you seriously. Can you think of any ways to help yourself stay calm and help your mental health in this process? It sounds like your wife is supportive.
Hello Scottishxxx...before you have the appointment I'd say it's imperative to a) work out what you want and b) talk openly with your wife about it. Though she obviously supports you cross dressing, how does she feel about you transitioning medically and becoming truly female? By the sounds of it you want to start the process by which you go onto hormones. On the NHS (for which your GP would be the gatekeeper) this is done via a Gender Identity Clinic. Your GP can refer you to one once you have the conversation with them. The waiting lists are HORRENDOUS. Anything up to 5 years in some cases. If you have the funds and your wife is agreeable there is the private route, for which your GP would also need to be involved. For this there is also a waiting list, albeit a lot shorter (I'm waiting for my first appointment in September - the wait will be just six months). Whatever happens, it's unlikely you will be 'rejected' by your GP, not if you speak honestly and from the heart about how you feel about yourself and your gender. And even if you do then...just find another GP who will refer you to a GIC. Anyway, good luck and do let us know how it goes! Beth x
I'm currently on meds to help keep me calm, wife is very understanding. I am going to have a deeper talk tonight with my wife tonight just to make sure we are both on the same wavelength.