Hi all, Thought I would post something a bit more positive for a change. For a while i have been ok with the fact that some of my friends know im gay. But i am never confortable enough to actually talk about it with them. I cant even bring the subject of being gay up with them. Likely mostly shame issues and such. Well after taking some inspiration from courageous people on here recently. I decided to ignore my fear and just say something small. So i told a few people about how i hooked up with a guy a few nights ago. I didnt give a whole lot of details, but even just admitting that i slept with a guy, is something ive never been able to do before. I know this is probably insignificant in the scheme of things, but im trying to take small steps to being more comfortable with myself, and with others knowing about me. So i suppose its a step in the right direction!
Taking small steps to be more comfortable with yourself is a good strategy, and you're definitely making steps in the right direction. The only caveat I would raise is that some people are not comfortable hearing about gay sex (not that you did). You know your friends best, but perhaps lead with "I met a nice guy" or "I had a good evening with a nice guy." That way you leave an opening for a deeper discussion, if they are curious. Close friends may in fact be interested in hearing about "the details." In any event, I've found that the more comfortable I became with myself, the more comfortable my friends were. Keep on marching to your drum, Questions93.
This is actually an enormous step! It's hard, even if people sort of know, to be out front about it when you're first coming to terms, so I think it's an awesome step!
Thanks Lek! Yeah makes sense. 2 were great about it, wanted to know more but i still wasnt comfortable enough to say anything else. One person was a bit funny when i told her, makes sense now after you saying that. Maybe she isnt really ok with hearing about guys actually being together.
Thanks Chip! I feel good about it. Like if i just keep chipping away at it, someday i might actually be able to be open!
Well done! That isn't a small step, it's a big and brave one. It took me ages to be able to state my sexuality out loud, even to a therapist in confidence (I had to write it down on a piece of paper - how's that for repressed lol). Speaking your truth out loud is a great step to self-acceptance. Congrats!
Hi Jggates, Thanks for that. Means a lot! Also dont worry, ive also gone through writing stuff on paper for a therapist!