today during drama class I thought about giving myself top surgery (I'm ftm) I would take two knives and a ton of paper towels and pain killers and basically rip my breasts out. I'm also on my period right now so I thought about sewing my vagina shut (not the pee hole I need that) it's not like I like penetration anyway. Obviously I wouldn't do something so stupid and possibly life threatening irl but it still conserns me a bit. I just wanna be free, I just wanna be me...
Hmmm. Is it out of your character to have such toughts? Do you enjoy violence in some way? Or is it because of bad mood?
But then my parents will know I'm trans Yes but "enjoy" is a strong word. I can't tell if it was because of a bad mood. My dysphoria tends to stay eternally in the background and then comes up at random times so it's impossible to tell
a counselor is supposed to keep confidentiality, my son was a minor and the counselor he was seeing wouldnt and couldnt tell me anything. my son did confide a lot, but still not all. i was ok with that.
can you contact the counselor between appointments and ask them to 'request they speak with you alone' but not let on to your mom?