So understanding my stance in the lgbt

Why would church elders and republican politicians, that supported homophobic laws, go out of there way, to be caught with male escorts?
Also, just because one considers themselves a self accepting lgbt individual, doesnt mean internalized homophobia has ended. Before gay marriage was passed, 10 years reversal some gays didnt approve of gay marriage. All sorts of flawed excuses were given by them- internalized homophobia. After it passed, there stance on it changed.
Internalized homophobia or shame, is very powerful, especially in a world that is not yet fully accepting of lgbt folks. One isnt given tools from childhood to accept themselves and for someone thats sexually fluid and trans, it may even be more difficult as what they are exposed to is only heteresexual and cis gender perspectives all the way to adulthood, its continuously affirmed.

Also your therapist needs to deal with your trauma , your molestation as a child. You need to heal from it to have a clear mind, as to who you are. For i dont understand how you were diagnosed with OCD before trauma therapy.

And the fact your already able to imagine the last option a guy. Thats very deep and i wont use the prison option, for you arent in prison and sure as hell, a straight mans nightmare is being forced to do anything with another guy, before prison.

For one to also claim that being lgb, means seeing yourself with a guy, in love married etc Thats a very shallow view of the community. For we erase those in the closet that find it difficult coming to terms with their sexuality, maybe due to religion or different factors, they cant even fathom a relationship.or sex with a guy if gay or bi/ with women if lesbian or bi, it would make them puke etc(internalized homophobia comes in there again)

So at the end of the day, you know yourself better. Words can be written here and twisted to affirm ones personal biases or objectives and equally gain responses that affirm a bias.

I hope very much that your therapist has dealt with your trauma as a child. I'll passionatly insist, on that bit of therapy, as its the most important subject that they need to deal with. You need to heal from that and its important. If your therapist brushes that bit off, then change the therapist for another better one, one that understands your situation and is open minded.
Not all of them are proffesional, some just want to make more money and they,'ll jump to the fastest diangnosis they find to push time.

 

Sorry on the therapy bit.My suggestion would be, you try a forum for victims of rape and molestation. To gain methods of healing from trauma, equally the impacts its had on others lives. That can be a more healthy start.

 

It's fair to say that most straight people have occasional thoughts and/or fantasies about the same sex and it doesn't cause them a great deal of stress or anxiety. Even if they follow through with their curiosity and experiment once or twice it doesn't necessarily make them bisexual or gay and they live very happily as they are, knowing the extent of their feelings, but still identifying as straight. Nobody can say they are wrong.

You referred to the Kinsey scale and asked where you might be placed and I would say 1 or 2, based purely on what you have told us. It's important to remember that Kinsey believed very few people are exclusively straight or gay and that it's normal to sit somewhere between 0 and 6. What do you think though?