I was at this event where we split into small groups, and I was part of a group of eight. One of the eight was a new friend, the other a new acquaintance, the rest strangers. One of the things we were supposed to share was something we were thankful for. On a spur of the moment decision, I shared that I was thankful for my friend coming down this weekend and going with me to Pride (our town holds it later), so I could be out and be myself for a little while without worrying about my family. My friend asked "Pagan Pride?" (that's coming up too) and I said, no, the other one. I could tell by her face she got it. I could also tell she didn't care- in the good way of not caring. This was a very liberal group so it felt safe, but that's a big thing for me to do, especially since I tend to be more self-conscious in groups, so I thought I'd share.
congrats. It's funny my first 'out' was the same - I just blurted it out... I didn't think coming out was a big deal but after it felt so good, liberating, freeing! How does it feel?
So wonderful kunoichi, well done bravo to you...can feel in your words and between the lines lightness and joy... so pleased for you.. your an inspiration...!!! I've found a local meetup - an intimate group for older men such as me, and intend going to their next get-together..its in my diary... I'm excited, nervous, committed...its time, and reading your experience put more light on why...its me. Thank you and well done to you.
I felt today almost like maybe it didn't happen. When I got together with the two people I knew today we were just chatting and I was trying to work it into conversation. They stayed very casual about it, just like if I had said the same stuff about a male partner. Which is exactly what I wanted. I am sure if I needed to talk about it I could have, but just to have it acknowledged as a reality was enough for now. And it's also kind of scary, because it's out there now. It's spoken. What if I'm wrong? Can I take it back?
Thanks everyone! It was a completely nerve wracking thing to do but it put me on a "high" the rest of the night. Then today I felt like I almost had to verify that it happened. Such a weird feeling.
Of course you can take it back. These things often to other people aren't nearly as big a deal as they are to us and we make them in our mind and that's just the nature of the beast but I think sometimes the ease with which other people react can almost come as a surprise as well.
Yes it's scary but what I found is the really scary part is acknowledging the passion I was feeling. the 'fear of being wrong' is common because it can feel like it's all in our heads. You can always take it back as @silverhalo said but if it helps, many of us who now know we were very very right felt this way! yes that's how I felt! and that I could be more honest with people that mattered. Not everyone has to know your personal life and feelings, but I felt I could be so much more open around people I cared about.
