I wish that I was feminine looking and wore pretty clothes. But that is not reasonable thing for me to want right now. Its stressful that this side of me exists that wants to be more feminine and free of the masculine attributes of me. Being miserable isn't what I want to be. But for me , just dressing as a guy doesn't feel right at all. I wonder how I can continue life the way that I am now , if it's the thing that makes me feel sick.
I like dressing a bit like a guy and having that kind of haircut but i dont hate that. Its natural for men. But i hate what dressing like that mean for society- it means i am unattractive for men and it makes me doubt my orientation and i have anxiety because of that. For what reasons do you hate your image and clothing style?
I don't really understand it much myself , in a way I don't really want to be a guy. Dressing and appearing like one saddens me and it's been a thing that has been with me for good portion of my life. My image reflects my unhappiness and what feels disgusting to me. The clothes that I wear which I wear that are baggy , feel foreign to me like all the male clothes that I have to wear. I want to wear dresses and skirts. I can't really say that I feel like either gender but being androgynous or feminine would be more ideal.
what prevents you from doing that? ( i dont know if u r "girl" or "boy") would you be shy to wear girly clothes?
Family and people important to me would disown due to their own views in life. Of course I would be considering the consequences.
I hate all my body hair, especially my facial hair. So i decided to spend what ever money I have left to get Electrolysis. I had my 1st treatment on my face this week and it will be a weekly thing until I get my whole face done. I will most likely go broke, but electrolysis is the only proven permanent hair removal system. Here's the big thing. It seems that I have to have electrolysis on my genitals before surgery. That won't be fun... ouch!!! :tears: