I don't know if this is the right place to put this but hopefully it is. Has anyone here not actually cried for fear of being gay or coming out to themselves etc.. I see all these people and they are like bawling for being gay and depression and stuff but its just different from me. I was raised in kind of a homophobic environment so I would think I would be one of the first to be crying because I was also homophobic. But I have noticed that I am very Stoic and kinda of well as some people would put it" almost emotionless" but I do feel emotion just Its hard to get me to cry. Am I the only one who hasn't cried over coming out or being gay or anything. I felt sad and felt like I could cry when I was coming to terms but never did, same with coming out to people including very close friends. I am just wondering if I am the only one who has barley shed one tear in the whole process of coming to terms, coming out, etc...? I knew it was completely ok for me to cry and all but I was raised to not cry to be strong and think positive not negative.Is it odd not to cry at all or at least barley cry I feel like if there are other people that haven't cried its probbaly going tobe rare but Im wondering if I am not alone (hopefully Im not alone:icon_redf)
Not sad at all. Not even a little. I have always been an Ally... So I think for me its not anything I am ashamed of. No tears for queers ❤️ Nothing wrong with loving differently.
I don't think I cried at all. The only time I cried was once when someone said something that felt like a deliberate attack on my sexuality.
Cried a lot. Still do... But now it's more of a crying becaues people don't get it and because I can't seem to find anybody that feels and is the same way as I do.
I never cried when I was coming out, I think it's because I'm disabled so I'm already different and so realizing I was gay didn't make me cry so much, I do cry though, I cry about being lonely when my mother attacks me about my sexuality, I tend to be more fustrated at my dad. but coming out never invoked serious crying, it does invoke me going really quiet though instead. So you are not alone. Here's a hug for you OP (*hug*)
I'm not sure if you are saying you wish you were more emotional, you seem a bit evasive on the subject. You might want to see a therapist and explore the issue with some supervision. In the mean time expose yourself to various forms of art and try and allow yourself to be moved by it. Art is designed to evoke emotion. It's not good to be emotionless or stoic as you put it. It prevents you from getting to know yourself and can make it difficult for you to form meaningful relationships.
I cried a fair bit... But not in the shame way, just in the despair way... didn't shed a tear much about sexuality, but gender, ouch...
I haven't been able to cry ever since I came out as trans, though it definitely isn't because I don't feel like crying. I think the reason I never cried was that when I finally opened up to people about my gender identity they didn't really react in the best way and ever since I've had a crippling fear of vulnerability.
i didn't cry, but i do feel some sort of pressure on my head when i coming to term with myself. Probably because I always knew that I'm different...
Ok, so with my sexuality while I was still questioning I'd cry at night when I was with my girlfriend because I knew my parents would not accept me.
I did when I was questioning probably 'cause I used to be fun of for being masculine so everyone thought I was gay. Once I actually realized I was bi I was relieved.
Nope - never shed a tear about being gay. But then I never felt that being gay was any big deal. That, plus being raised to not really care about what other people think kind of cut down on the whole emotional stress thing. Anyway, sex with dudes felt great, so why would it bother me? Todd
Not me. Concluding I was bi and maybe pan wasn't scary or even particularly emotional. I just found a sense of peace knowing I wasn't a total weirdo, for that reason at least XD.
I didn't cry for being gay. At one point I cried because one of my friends didn't accept me, but that's it.
I didn't cry. I rarely cry. I have had lots of anxiety about coming out, though. I was just silent. In my life, I have learned that I fare best when I keep my emotions to myself.
I can't recall ever really crying. I felt/still feel overwhelmed sometimes, and I probably could cry, I just haven't. Mostly I just feel like I'm being buried alive or something... it's more of an anxiety response than anything else. It's difficult. everyone has a different way of coping. Like MissMonster (see above) I've been a huge ally as long as I can remember, but I still felt weirdly afraid of my sexuality. It's a lot to handle sometimes. I dunno... it's completely different for everyone. But if I were you, I would be relieved not be crying. **Your feelings are still just as valid and strong, no matter how you outwardly express them.**
But the thing is I have always been this way its just me.Its not that I'm emotionless I feel emotions just I keep some of it inside and just let it fade away. I feel joy, happiness, sadness, etc.. I just keep all the sadness and depression inside though because I don't want people to see my crying and stuff I like people seeing me as the calm controlled person. It may not be the healthiest thing by keeping it all inside but its what I have always done and will continue to do and Art does not move me at all never has never will.I always knew I was different I knew I was gay or at least I knew I liked boys so being gay I guess did not mentally phase me as much as it has done to other people. But you are right about the meaningful friendships thing I was and am still not able to form strong connections with people but thats mainly because Im afraid to open up for reasons that would be better explained by starting a different thread.
By the time I figured out I was questioning I had grown so supportive. Now I've come close and may over my best friend last night