What are you thinking?

I'm playing my PS Vita and not really paying attention to the talent shows my dad seems to obsessively watch.

Him - "What a load of crap. Embellished! It's a talent contest. Not a fibbing contest. Shut up! You're supposed to sing, you gobby cunt."

Me - "How can she sing, if she shuts up?"

Him - "Shut up, I'm trying to watch her sing."

Me - "It's more like you're listening to her sing."

Him - "What... what goes on in that head of yours?"

Me - "Dragons."

Him - "I mean... what's wrong with you? Is it maniac depression?" (he always says maniac, instead of manic)

I don't remember the rest of it. I kept playing dumb, because it was more fun than watching TV. He also says gender, instead of genre, when we're talking about music. I know I shouldn't find it funny. Hell, I use double negatives. Plus you can probably tell my grammar is terrible. Anyway, he might seem harsh, but my dad is more honest than Simon Cowell.

 

If I don't lose my mind by the end of this week, it will be a miracle.

 

Hang in there, Brad. (*hug*)

 

Asked the guy I like if he wants to go on a date. Gah. GAhhHHHHHhhhhh.

 

Lol! My mother always says: "Watching you like a dork" instead of "Watching like a hawk" :lol:

 

I need someone to talk to

 

I'm here for you Fugs. (*hug*)

 

I failed again.

 

Failed what?

 

Couldn't stop myself from cutting :/

 

I'm so sick of allergies...my eyes are watering so much I'm having trouble seeing my computer screen. It's been going on for weeks now :bang:

 

When you finish making your opening argument in a paper and lean back from the screen like:





*Granted, I still have eight more pages to write, but let me have this moment.

 

It would make sense if she were referring to a superdork with 20/4 vision lol. I'd know if it were possible because that person would be approached for a documentary and exploited for maximum drama.

 

- I get shit on for not being an ideal race/skin tone.

- I get shit on for identifying as asexual.

- I get shit on for identifying as agender/non-binary.

I'm not allowed to (potentially happily) have any of my identity, am I?

And want to know what all three of those things have in common? Let me give you one hint: the straight people I know (mostly) aren't even aware of what those last two things are.

You guessed it! They have all come from the lgbt community.

*confetti*

 

Hi, I know this kinda weird but this is the 1st time in my life I've admitted to myself that I am a man in a woman's body. It makes me feel better just saying that I am a man

 

For some reason, tonight my dad just noticed for the first time that I have basically no arm hair. I've never had much body hair, just the top of my head, groin, and (if I stop shaving for a few hours) face.

 

I wish my body was like any other guy.

I've lost weight. My face has slimmed down. I pass as a little boy again.

But it's still not right.. I just watched a movie that starred a guy about my age. His voice was 100% man, he walked around the house without a shirt..
Things that I can't do..


Then there's real life. The guy in the house next door; I knew him since we were both little kids. He's younger than me and his voice already changed. He's taller than me, he's going through the changes I should be, but I'm not... I'm a teenager for fucks sakes, I shouldn't look or sound like a 12 year old kid.

I wish my body wasn't so fucking defective.

 

The past 48 hours have been hectic. Not in a terribly active way, but an internal one. Between writing two pieces for the paper, jogging, school, saving the world one thread at a time, maintaining my aura of confidence, and being a guru, has about put me down.

I'm going to wind up killing myself, because of wanting to send my pieces in the first Monday of the week, instead of waiting closer to Friday afternoon's deadline. Got to tone it down with the dedication, at least by a day or two, LOL.

I need a scalp massage, my feet soaking in hot water, and a bag of Starburst.

 

Watching a movie on Netflix, and the subtitles are so annoying. Seriously, they're huge and I can't turn them off. I speak Japanese, I don't need huge-ass English subtitles getting in the way!