Hello All! I've come here as I am sure most of you have, for support. I feel like no one in my personal life understands how I feel or would understand how I feel even if I tried to explain. So, here it is. I've dated both men and women. I have ended up in relationships with men although I have always sought to be with a woman. I am in a heterosexual relationship now but it is more like we are best friends... It's difficult to explain. To make a long story short, in my heart I know I'm a lesbian, my significant other knows as well. My sexuality is only a facet of our problems and it is on my mind everyday, I feel dirty, like I'm living a lie. I wake up at night and just two words cross my mind: I'm gay. It crosses my mind every day several times a day... That's it, I'm a lesbian living a dirty hetero lie and I feel like I can't change that. I don't want to ruin my relationship of several years and break the heart of our 5 year old but secretly swooning over women and feeling unsatisfied with romance and intimacy has taken its toll on me. I've been told to either leave or to "get over it". Well, for a girl who knew that barbies should be dating other barbies at 5, I will not get over it. For now, I need to know that I'm not the only one who has been here. Help? Thank you!
Hi; welcome to EC! Can't say I've been where you've been, but I know that many others have. If you take a look at the LGBT later in life forum, you'll see a lot of people who married in a heterosexual relationship, but are gay. So no, you're not alone. I hope you get the advice you need. Best of luck. I wish you and your family the best. (*hug*)
Hello and welcome to EC, as Nychthemeron said LGBT later in life may help, feel free to message me if you need anything or want to chat.
:smilewave Thanks for the welcome! :smilewave ---------- Post added 6th Jul 2014 at 09:31 PM ---------- "Later in life" ^^^ Way to make a woman feel old :icon_wink
