I've been with this guy for about 8 months now and we have been sexually active for several months now. The first time he tried to give anal sex to me he couldn't stay erect so I just shrugged it off. I've expressed that I want to try it (he's the only person I've had sex with), but it just doesn't happen. I talked to him about it and he says he thinks he might be addicted to porn. He's been trying his hardest not to watch porn and I think that has helped, but it still isn't enough. I told him he should go see a therapist or something that specializes in sexual matters but he is mortified of telling his parents about his problem and I don't blame him. It's already difficult enough to talk about it with me. His parents aren't too keen on his "gay lifestyle". I just don't know what I can do to help out? I don't want to break up over something like this. I think he believes that if he doesn't fix the problem I will break up with him, but I told him I wouldn't. I just don't know what I am supposed to do! Anyone else experience this? What did you do the remedy the situation?
My ex was the same, but it only happened sometimes. He also shrugged it off, and we usually switched places. Have you tried that? But other than that there is viagra etc, but it's really your decision. Sorry if this doesn't help much!
Assuming that he doesn't have this problem when he's masturbating to porn by himself, then it is a largely psychological issue. It's not unusual- it happens quite often with guys who are sexually inexperienced and who have been jacking off for a while. Having sex with another person is very different from getting yourself off. Cutting back on porn will help. Usually, this is something that gets better with time and a regular partner. You said you've been dating for 8 months. For how long has he been having trouble staying hard with you? Is it just when he tops you or is it something that happens when he bottoms or during oral and other activities?
