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What is Asexuality/Sexual Attraction?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Bisurprise, Oct 27, 2021.

  1. jjusa

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    To go back to the OP...

    I’m not sure I’m the right person to answer your question bc I have 0% sexual experience and I am probably asexual myself (still questioning that part). However, from talking to others who do not identify as asexual, sexual attraction is like a sliding scale (not an orientation). You may only be sexually attracted to someone by getting to know them better or you may be sexually attracted to strangers you just met. Not everyone who isn’t asexual wants to have sex with the first attractive person they see.
     
  2. jjusa

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    I agree with what you’re saying. Romance is really an emotionally intimate friendship. Personally, however, I wouldn’t want to make out with my friends or do romantic activities with them. I draw the line there, but I get that for other people, they have no problem doing these things with their friends.
     
  3. out2019

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    Yes the above was my experience exactly and I in my years here i have seen the exact pattern dozens of times.

    When I was still in denial/bargaining here someone suggested that my attraction to women would fade and I was terrified. But one day I found myself relieved that I didn't 'have to' look at women anymore, and I realized that the idea of sex with women actually grossed me out.
     
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  4. Chip

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    I think if you're making out with them, then it's sexual, because you're acting on sexual attraction/behavior, not romantic, at least as the "romantic attraction" folks describe it. They describe "romantic attraction" as someone they have zero sexual interest in. I don't think you'd make out with someone you have zero sexual interest in.

    What's interesting is that a lot of folks, especially those under 30, seem to be very comfortable with non-sexual cuddling with friends, and, to further support the "non-sexual" nature of it, people who are totally straight will often cuddle with other same-sex, totally straight people. Or gay guys will cuddle with straight girls. At least, based on the samples of folks I know who are under 30.
     
    #24 Chip, Nov 1, 2021
    Last edited: Nov 1, 2021
    Obliteratrix47 and BiGemini87 like this.
  5. jjusa

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    I made out with a boy once and thought I was sexually interested in him, but it turned out not to be true at all. I was so happy it ended