I’m 15 and a female. I thought I was straight most of my life. Very into guys. Even almost dated a guy. I always liked the thought of kissing girls more than guys. I met this girl at a camp and we bonded really quickly and I realised I liked her more than a friend. When we returned from the camp,(she lived in another state) I felt jealous when she mentioned her supposed boyfriend. Ever since then I’ve noticed I find girls attractive and can see my self dating/falling for a girl but am more attracted to guys a lot more and see myself with a guy in my future relationships and having kids. Am I bisexual if I like guys more? I’ve read that you dont have to be 50/50 but sometimes I question a lot about why just now I’ve discovered this. Hope you all had a good coming out day/spirit day etc.
Bisexual is about being able to be attracted to both. So even if it is 99% one and 1% the other that still qualifies as bisexual. Even if you go on to marry a man and have children and not ever have a relationship or sex with a woman if you are attracted to women you can be bisexual. At 15 you also have a lot of time ahead to be able to experience things and figure it out.
Welcome to EC, Lemony! It certainly sounds like you are, based on your attraction to both. Don't worry too much about only realizing it now; 15 is actually pretty early for a lot of people, and you'll find plenty here who haven't worked out their sexual orientation/gender identity until well into adulthood. But I guess in answer to the why, I'd say it might just be that you haven't been around or met any girls that fit into the specific type(s) that you're attracted to. Or it could have been a matter of suppressing those feelings beforehand, though I won't presume to know one way or another. Remember, it's not about who you're with or whether you've had experiences or not: It's about how you feel.
Do you know any sections on EC that could help me that are In my age range? I turn 16 in three days. Thank you for both of your answers.
There really is not a section/sub-forum specifically for teens at EC. It is more organized by subject. If you have more specific questions regarding your orientation you could just keep adding things to this thread or create another one here in the "Sexual Orientation" sub-forum to ask another specific question. The others that might be helpful could be about coming out if that is an issue or about family and friends both of those have sub-forms for them.
Hi @Lemony, As @QuietPeace said, EC’s sub forums are organised by topic or theme, rather than age. I appreciate we have a “Later in Life” section, but it’s not age specific. It gives people a place to discuss things like coming out to spouses and children, etc. As @BiGemini87 says, 15 is still relatively young and wouldn’t spend too much time wondering why now. I was in my late twenties (and in a long term heterosexual relationship) when I worked out that I’m gay. It happens. To go back to your original post...what stood out to me is that you said you “always liked the thought of kissing girls more than guys” and yet you’re “attracted to guys a lot more”. Do you mean in terms of frequency or intensity? By the way, you could do the whole having children thing with a female partner too. It doesn’t have to be a man. Is there anything specific that you wanted more help or input on? You could post again here or start a new thread, maybe somebody closer to your age will reply. Take care, LostInDaydreams
Hi LostInDaydreams, I’m more attracted to guys yes. When was younger I always preferred the thought of kissing girls than boys and it felt more natural. I thought it was just an age thing and when I would hit puberty the urge to kiss boys would be more powerful. Then I realised when I made this friendship with this girl at 13/14 it was still there and then that kind of opened more feelings for girls in different ways. But I get more crushes on guys more than girls but now that I’m coming to terms with my feelings as normal and not strange I can see that I do get some crushes on girls too. I always ask myself am I just straight and confused, or because I feel lonely. I have to remind myself that yes I am bisexual and it doesn't have to be 50/50. I hope that answers the question. I think It might be 70/30 or 80/20. I’m not sure. I do see myself with a guy or a girl in possible future relationships.
Hi @Lemony, It’s good that you are aware that your attractions don’t need to be 50/50 and I don’t think you need to work out a ratio, as I’m sure you also know. Anything that is unclear will probably become clearer with time.
