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Still questioning, have an overwhelming amount of signs I might be gay

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by confused155, Oct 27, 2020.

  1. PeterWI

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    I mean, I know straight guys like it too. But if it's the *only* thing you like... well, then something's probably up. I also tried to "bargain" by trying to get into S&M stuff. Just desperate for something that would turn me on. It turned out that I'm not into that at all, LOL.
     
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  2. SGee

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    awesome post !
     
  3. SGee

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    so true
     
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  4. out2019

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    Yeah. I realized, it was the only think I really liked, but I couldn't really get aroused thinking about 'doing stuff' until I tought about a guys ass. It was pretty all over :slight_smile:
     
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  5. SGee

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    turns me on so badly!
     
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  6. TheJack

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    This is the first time I've heard about this.
     
  7. PeterWI

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    I'm sure there are a lot of personal differences in what form repression and denial takes. But we're all human, so we'll find some people who are similar, too.
     
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  8. JessNC

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    Can you say more about focusing on women's asses and this "bargaining" phase? It somehow rings true to my experience but I havent discussed it with anyone or read about it previously.
     
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  9. TheJack

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    I would also like to hear more about this, because being an ass man myself, I disagree. Maybe this is because one of my exes was a shortstack with ass that you could have a picnic on, but I've the "ass" to probably be my favorite parts of a woman.
     
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  10. RD Spencer

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    There is a song called
    “Baby got back”.

    Just look it up and listen to the lyrics, it says a lot about what straight guys like.
     
  11. TheJack

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    By the philosopher and scholar, Sir Mix-A-Lot
     
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  12. 10 5 gang

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    I think I am where you were. How did you explore you homosexuality? I would like to remove my conditioned responses to women.
     
  13. Contented

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    I think as you come to embrace your homosexuality that conditioned response to women fades on its own. For me as I started to develop an emotional as well as a sexual bond with another man the whole idea of being with a woman started to seem wrong. It opened my eyes to beginning to realize my entire attraction to women was not genuine. It took me a while to work through the idea that after all this time I was actually gay. I had never felt as connected to a woman as I did with a man. Sex with women had never been that rock your world sensuality I felt with another man. I was flood by the sensuality, passion, eroticism and romantic pleasure being with another man provided me. The flood gates had been opened to something I had kept buried so deep I even fooled myself into thinking I was heterosexual. Over a fairly short period of time the attraction to women faded, then the ability to be intimate with my then gf disappeared. The idea of having sex with her started to seem disgusting to me and I avoided any chance of intimacy. I broke off our relationship by being honest with her which did not go over well. However I felt relief that I no longer had to pretend, I started to notice guys exclusively. Women are not even an afterthought these days. I am so much happier as an openly gay man and miss nothing of my formerly “ straight” life.
     
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  14. 10 5 gang

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    I'm working on a bind with a guy. It's going well. I enjoy talking to him he's ready going. The only problem is I can't get aroused at the thought of him or any guy. Did you go through something similar? Did you have to accept being gay to finally feel an arousal to men or was that always there?
     
  15. Contented

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    I think our internal homophobia prevents us from really acknowledging our same sex attraction at the beginning. It takes a while to go from acknowledging attraction to arousal as we come to terms with our homosexuality. I think this is normal and something we all have to work through. As the comfort level with being gay increases the ability to start to tear down the walls of compulsory heterosexuality become easier as does the ability to see gay sexuality as normal and healthy.
     
    #55 Contented, Dec 31, 2020
    Last edited: Dec 31, 2020
  16. 10 5 gang

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    I've been out for a few years and it's still there. Idk what to do at this point.
     
  17. 10 5 gang

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    It's crazy you know. To hear that in all your years, there was never even an inkling of gay signs. Did you ever get off to penis in porn through while growing up? Or were you entirely"straight" without even a clue, morsel, of evidence?
     
  18. RD Spencer

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    What are your thoughts on conditioned vs genuine attraction? How to tell the difference?
     
  19. 10 5 gang

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    I honestly do not know. I'm confused. But let me ask what are your fantasies like
     
  20. RD Spencer

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    From the beginning I was able to be aroused by both sexes in my fantasies. When physically around other people I find myself more attraction to and drawn to women. Also, I have only had crushes on women. It is the sexual desires in my fantasies that cause me to question my sexuality and that was in my early teens. I have only dated women and have been married for almost 18 years and my sexuality has not been an issue.