I’ve been seeing this new guy and things started really strong with him texting me every morning. Last Monday we kissed, and I think it might have been a bit much for him because he said it was the first time he kissed a guy even though had messed around with guys before (for some context, he dated women before me). In any event, he texted me the next morning on Tuesday, but then I hadn’t heard from him until I texted today asking if he wanted to meet up this weekend. He said he is free Saturday and Sunday but he didn’t initiate anything specific. A part of me feels like the writing is on the wall, but I also don’t just want to walk away because I really felt something for him and I thought he did too
If he told you he's available, that's probably him inviting you to make the plans. Sometimes people say "sure!" when someone asks them out, but they don't suggest an activity, or a date/time and leave it open ended as a way of not saying no outright but hopefully letting it pass unceremoniously. This doesn't sound like that. If he's not texting you as much it's possibly because of what you mentioned but he's suggested his whole weekend as an availability. If you're still interested you should see if he responds to a date suggestion for tomorrow or Sunday.
Depending on how close you've become it could just be worth talking that over. Looking at this from where I am (which may be close to where he is in some ways), I discovered I was bi while married. As of now I don't anticipate ever dating a man but if that changes I would definitely be into taking it slow... He may be in a similar place, at least in feeling out a relationship with another man if he's only been serious with women before. Having a conversation to feel that out could be valuable.
So we planned to get lunch tomorrow. I’m aiming to go into it without any questions or serious talks, just a nice lunch for about an hour and then a hey this was great we should get together again later this week if you’re free. Wish me luck.
We had a good lunch and I did what I said I would do in terms of being casual and suggesting a later meet-up at the end. It seems a bit of a stretch to think that we have a romantic future ahead of us at this point, but I’m really glad that I tried, and you never know. The main thing is I didn’t want us to just stop talking because I felt our connection was better than that. I feel a weight has been lifted, hopefully for him too
Sometimes, when we are seeking love and trying to build a relationship we need to be brave and quite bold. We need to take the initiative and push against some of our natural barriers. That doesn't mean dismantling all of our red lines and throwing caution to the wind, but if we start to crystal ball things and adopt a wait and see approach the other person could see it as a lack of interest and just move on. If he has little experience of dating guys he will be dealing with his own uncertainties and may question how to proceed. If you also question how to proceed and don't take the initiative it will result in stalemate.
