hi all, its been ages since i last posted here so please bear with me for what could be a really long post! also please note that i dont find anyone gross at ALL (sadly just me) I am a lesbian who met someone through work recently that i fancy. we became very close quite quickly and, even though i only come out to correct people when assumed straight etc, i came out to her relatively “casually” because i thought it would ease my anxiety if she knew i fancied girls as we were hanging out loads etc by chance, its been the last time ive seen her due to covid rules and i now wonder if ive grossed her out etc just to realize that its not her that is grossed out by the fact that she might guess i fancy her but actually I am the one that is grossed out by the idea of her knowing i fancy her. This is making me deal with a significant amount of feelings of internalized homofophia as i feel that its just not ok to like her to some level im not really experienced and i have trouble finding people i fancy so i am now stuck in a very incomfortable position as i have to battle with my own demons whilst still working remotely with her.. any advice? sorry if it was a bit of a ramble but im feeling quite fragile/ anxious right now!
Hi Internalised homophobia is insidious … and always necessary to keep a check on it The risk is … overthinking things. I suggest you just live day to day and see what happens. Stay a bit detached … you may be pleased with what develops
