This is more of a rant / A way of trying to make sense of this... but yeah... About 4 months ago I was video chatting with a guy and I struggled to stay "on". And for the past 4 months I havent really had a healthy sex drive. My sex life is non-existence but I'd still... you know... I try to blow off steam alone but I'd struggle to stay on. If I watch things, I struggle to turn on. If I start engaging with someone online who I find hot, I turn on for about 2 minutes, then turn off again. Becuase of that, I feel it may be psychological (i have been going through A LOT of stress/anxiety lately. Like, very bad ) The past 4 months have been a VERY dark place for me. Getting very dark, indeed. And I think actually it may have all started when I struggled to stay on with that guy on video chat. I questioned "am i even gay?". But actually looking back, I think due to my lack of experience - I didnt realise i don't enjoy being the... err... "submissive" one... I enjoy being the one who is "top". becasue a week or 2 ago, i spoke to someone online who errr. yeah... I wont go into details. But my friend said im a "selfish top" which apparently is a meme lol It might just be that im bored of being alone at home and I need to go and find and meet people. But im just so scared that I'll meet someone and wont get turned on and be able to perform. in the past I've performed and the sex was amazing. So I know I am gay because sex with opposite sex was horrendous for me. I dunno. I also have a problem of smoking cigarettes and "soft" drugs. So I'm cutting down the cigarettes/"soft" drugs. and I'll arrange to talk to my doctor. I want to talk to him about Sexual health (recurrant testing) and about this ED problem. mehhh. I feel so down about this. I really hope I can fix this >< Im only 27. i feel like i should be doing fine. Ohh, another thing I found interesting over the past few months is whjen I was taking Vitamin D - I was getting ON all the time. so I dunno what this could mean? Ima start taking Vitamin D again and see if what happens. Which actually - tbf- If my depression is linked to lack of vitamin D (soimething I DO lack) then maybe it IS just depression/anxiety.... Ill keep this thread updated
Hello there, honey. I'm Lydia. This isn't usually my field of expertise (if I have one...), but I noticed silence on the subject, and I didn't want to leave you hanging. Based on what you've outlined, there really is only one course I can advise you: Please talk to your doctor! This goes deeper than a lack of community or a troubling relationship or some confusing personal questions; it's physical.There are so many things that can cause sexual disruptions, some of which you may have no awareness of and a few of which are pretty awful, if not addressed. Don't wait. Don't keep suffering this uncertainty and shame. See a doctor. I promise you'll get better, more personal advice there. Hugs and good vibes, dear!
Definitely talk to your doctor. I have this as an occasional problem, the first time it hit me I was right around your age. It happens to me every so often and while it's frustrating in the moment it doesn't really bother me anymore. Usually, if it happens I just slow things down a bit, it normally comes back once I start to relax. BUT: TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR. It often is psychological but there can be physical causes, too, that are better checked out.
