So it's taken me a really long time to accept that I a feminine man. Part of that was not wanting to be seen as gay, which I have experimented and have decided that I don't like cis males. However I do like androgynous females even masculine females. Which is to say I like women who might be seen a boyish, they have short hair dress like male that sort of appearance. So my issue is I have come to realize that my physical attraction might mean I find individuals in the non binary or amended or transmasc spectrum attractive. If that does happen what should I say my orientation is? Any advice, encouragement, research would be great.
Being attracted to masculine women doesn't mean you're not straight. For example, if a lesbian is attracted to masculine women, she is still a lesbian, and it's the same with straight men. Sexual orientation is also based more on biological sex than it is on gender or gender presentation. So you can be attracted to non-binary people who are biologically female, and still be a straight man. However, if you think that "straight" does not describe your feelings accurately, you can use a different label, such as polysexual. Polysexuality means being attracted to multiple genders but not all of them. If you can't find a label that describes you best, you don't have to use any. Most importantly, if you want to choose a label, choose the one that you feel the most comfortable with and that communicates your feelings the best. Hope I've helped in some way
Brett.....Hello and a great big LGBTQIA+ welcome to Empty Closets! I can remember the first post that I made on EC. I was desperate for help and I got the help that night that I so needed. I hope that we can help you in the same way that I received help. The most important thing to remember about Empty Closets is that we do care about you! We're very glad that you found us here on EC and hope that we can answer questions, give you support and provide a place to vent (as long as it's not violent!) when that becomes necessary! *****As others have mentioned, there is no requirement to have a label. For some people they can be really helpful and in other cases they can just confuse things. There are times when no label seems to fit. Because of this there has been a tendency lately for more and more "designer" labels to appear. I fear sometimes that this may do more harm than good. I'm certainly not anti-label as I felt for many years that I didn't "fit" anywhere until I accepted that I am and always have been gay. That label means a lot to me, so I'm in no way discouraging anyone from using a label. I'm just concerned that sometimes the search for a label becomes more important than learning about ourselves and accepting who we really are. So go ahead and be who you are...don't let anyone tell you that you are "less than" some expectation they or anyone else has. You be you and be proud! *****There are 18 different sub-forums here that you can check out and join in the conversations or start your own thread/conversation. When you have made at least 10 posts on various threads you will be able to post messages on a member's Profile Page. Just click on a member's Avatar Picture and then click on "Profile Page" in the dialogue box that pops up. You'll then be on their Profile Page and there will be a box that says: "Write Something" When you have been on EC for a few weeks and have made at least 50 posts on various forums, you can apply for Full Membership. A Full Member can send Private Messages (PM) to other Full Members and share personal contact info. Right now you can only send a PM to a Staff Member as that is always possible. Here is a quote from the Full Membership information forum: *****To be eligible you must be a member of Empty Closets for a minimum of two weeks, and have a minimum of 50 posts. These posts must be across numerous forums (Fun & Games does not contribute to post count), and consistently posted across a minimum of two weeks. You wouldn't be eligible, for example, if you registered, had no activity for two weeks, and then returned to post 50 times on your 14th day of membership. *****Well, as I said, we're very glad you found us! If you have any questions at all, you can send me a Private Message. .....David
Thanks for the reply. You were very helpful. I have searched for something that matches well for me. Obviously if my life partner ends up being female identified I will stick with straight my only worry was if I met a person who didn't identify as female. But I suppose I can cross that bridge once I get there.
I Normally I wouldn't think it would but if I expand my marriage options passed female identified persons it's likely that partner might feel insulted if I kept saying I was straight.
Thanks so much I will reach out if I continue to need support. Also you have a fantastic sight that I look forward to exploring.
Hello, Brett! I'll echo @Aelin56 on this: sexual orientation is, as the name implies, sex-based--so being attracted to masculine women still falls under straight. But of course, whatever label you choose (or if you choose not to use one at all) is fine; labels are a means of communicating to ourselves and others who we are/what we like/etc. So if you don't feel like straight fits or you want to convey that you're unsure/open to different experiences, that's okay! Do whatever feels comfortable to you.
