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Career anxiety

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by musicteach, Oct 31, 2020.

  1. LetsGoNow

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    You seem to know what you are doing.

    I'm clueless.
     
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  2. Unsure77

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    Congratulations!!!! That's exciting! Happy for you and your family!
     
  3. musicteach

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    It’s ok not to have everything mapped out. What’re you passionate about?

    Now I have to start the monumental process of getting them up to my expectations. It’s ok I’ve got a plan. First step is research. Need to know what they do how they do it and why. Got to plan it out.
     
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  4. LetsGoNow

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    Honestly comedy. I love joking about.
     
  5. musicteach

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    Do it. You can do it.
     
  6. Unsure77

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    You got this!
     
  7. musicteach

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    I went and signed paperwork today! I dragged my fiancé with me just because. Met all of the coaches, all of the athletics department, the other music professors, even a couple of students and the current drum majors. Everybody was really great, really nice although I suspect the two drum majors might be a lil salty with me come the spring time. But of course so will the section leaders probably. That’s because I’m going to make them audition for their positions for next year. That way everyone has a fair chance at section leader, captain, and drum major.

    The athletics director had a whole box of stuff for me. And they guessed my clothing sizes amazingly. This box had eight t-shirts, ten polos, a couple pairs of jogging pants and four hoodies. Some of the clothing was athletics department and some was specifically for the marching band. This box of goodies had a traveling coffee cup (one of the nice insulated ones) and a metal water bottle which is a nice size. Absolutely perfect because I drink a lot of water. It also had a plastic water bottle which is a little smaller than the metal one. There’s an umbrella, a rain poncho, and toboggan for my head.

    They wanted me to take my faculty picture for my ID card and stuff today too but I had to veto that. I was wearing jeans and a band hoodie and not photo ready. Which that’s fine they told me I’ll just have to come do it before I can be on campus wondering around without an escort. And they invited me to the homecoming game this Saturday, so that should be fun!
     
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  8. Lyman

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    Hi, Musicteach. Your should be grateful for having someone like your fiancé in your life. <3

    And you did the right thing listening to him. He was right, no matter how much you hate admitting it, lol.

    Best of lucks with this exciting new adventure! It seems it began quite well, didn't it?
     
  9. musicteach

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    Yanno he continuously pushes me to be a better version of myself as do I him. Like today with it being Veteran’s day we didn’t have school today but the band had an engagement at 11. I was not feeling getting up this morning and working out. I just wanted to lay in my bed! It was cold in the house this morning my bed was warm. But he kept telling me no babe C’mon you’ll hate yourself later if you don’t. He made me get up and we had our workout time. Which I always enjoy that because it does get you energetic ready to start the day.

    As much as I hate admitting when he’s right, he knows me so well sometimes it’s scary. On performance there’s saying “everything is ok until the conductor panics”. When I get on stage to conduct the concert band I’m cool calm and collected. That’s my element I’m ready to rock and roll. You have to radiate that calm to your musicians. When you pick up that baton to conduct, you have to be the lighthouse to guide them. You have to be rock steady because if not they’re going to pick up on that and are going to be even more nervous than they already are.

    That’s how most people see me, especially students/parents. He has seen me pace the kitchen in my suit with no shoes on. He’s seen me when I get off stage and have to discretely throw up because my stomach has been doing back flips the whole time. He’s seen me sit on the sideline at competition literally bouncing with bundled energy because I know it’s all them while they’re on the field. I’m terrible at competitions for marching band. I my staff/fiancé literally sandwich me between them because at comps if the band’s director jumps up and is trying to help the show they can be disqualified.

    I’m really excited for homecoming. The athletics director said he was going to introduce me to the marching band. I asked could I warm them up my way and give ‘em just a lil taste of what they’re going to get all next season. So hopefully he can work that out.
     
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  10. musicteach

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    Soooooo. Yesterday was interesting. And we’ve established a couple of things.

    1) They aren’t entirely sure about me at all. Some of them straight up simply do not like me, AT ALL. Which was rather amusing because they don’t even know me.

    2) The idea of being “on time” is apparently foreign to them. Most were 5 minutes after the hour they were supposed to report by. Which ok cool whatever. This one Jr though, showed up 43 minutes late. And he interrupted warmups being loud and obnoxious.

    Which #2 is what led to #1. Let me tell you what happened. So we’re getting warmed up, director of athletics introduced me to everyone as the band director for next year. He also put it out there since the paperwork is official, I’m going to be starting to work with them in preparation for next year — which is true. (Side note: I’m talking to HR Monday to see exactly how soon that can be or what we can do). So this young man shows up 43 mins late to rehearsal, completely out of “uniform”. He supposedly had the “uniform” in his bag but nonetheless.

    So he gets to warmups, and we’re working on scales getting warm air flowing through the instruments, and here he comes. Being loud and obnoxious. “Yo what’s up homies!? Y’all started without me!!” Etc. So I motioned him and told him to come here. We introduced ourselves yanno. I said “I guess clocks ain’t a big thing around here?”

    He goes “Naw don’t be like that. I’m just running a lil late.” I told him “From my understanding you run a little late everyday. You better get you a watch for next year if you want to March in this band next season.” “Naw man it ain’t like that.” I said “No, it is like that. Not only are you unacceptably late, you’re out of uniform, and you interrupted my rehearsal in an unacceptable manner. Go home. You’re not needed for today’s game.”

    Yes I sent him home! Better figure out how to be on time.

    Then he’s gonna say “You can’t do this. I’m the tuba section leader.” I said “Then you should know the importance of being on time. If you can’t make it to the game on time, that’s probably why the tubas don’t know how to come in on time.” He stomped off in a huff, and the whole band had a hushed buzz about them. I told them “It is the Eve before a new day, ladies and gentlemen. Next season I will be a breath of fresh air for this program. Y’all got some decisions to make and make ‘em fast. I can be a cool summer breeze or I can be a hurricane and uproot the dead trees. Let’s get back to work.”
     
  11. Lucy Marie

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    Good for you!!! Being able to make an example now will make things easier down the road (or field). I am novice educator—but I hope support from school/staff will make up for issues with students.
    Thanks for update!
    ((fiancé)) you better be passing those along and taking them yourself:wink:
    ((musicteach))
    ((momhugs))
     
  12. musicteach

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    Being that he was a section leader to boot? Makes it sting a little more. Like I told them. It’s the Eve of a brand new day. And they better be ready.
     
  13. Lucy Marie

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    Oh, you can do better than that....it’s the musical reckoning or such. Everyone uses new day, etc. I challenge you to do better.

    ((momhugs))

    ps so dunderhead was a leader? all the more reason to (insert your pithy phrase here)
    pps was this same guy with colored sticks?
     
  14. DecentOne

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    Hi musicteach,

    Congrats on the new job. You seem ready to face the challenges!

    I remember a house manager leading an early renters-group meeting and being very strict, and reciting all sorts of expectations. I was kind of insulted. I went to him later said I was uncomfortable and asked him what it was about. He said he realized I was mature, as was another guy renting there, but there were a couple teen college students renting for the first time and they were apparently not up to speed on self-discipline and expectations. I appreciated the private moment to chat. I wasn’t going to be a problem, and didn’t want to be treated like one, so I appreciated that he said what he said privately when I approached him.

    There are some who learn to have internal discipline before they get to college, others were micromanaged or just never paid attention. Good for you to set the standards you expect under your leadership. It is respectful to the whole group too to demand folks act appropriately, not disruptively. I hope you have a couple mature ones come to you and say “no problem, and thanks for dealing with the immature one”.
     
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  15. musicteach

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    One of the biggest things I’m going to run into issues with, and this has already been demonstrated with this small interaction, is the lack of discipline. Punctuality, attendance, and coming prepared are some of the biggest things that get me. Those are huge pet peeves for me. Musicianship, showmanship, drill mastery, visual effects these are things I can fix during rehearsal. But you have to show up to practice. I look at it like this when it says rehearsal starts at 5 o’clock, that means that at 5 o’clock I expect the band to start warm ups, both physical, mental, drill, and music. You should already be unpacked, ready to get started.

    It starts with discipline. Of oneself, of each other, of the whole band. And that starts with a standard. My standards are high. Always have been. I demand and will accept nothing less than excellence. As Denzel said in “Remember the Titans” we will be perfect in everything we do. We build and we grow until we exceed our standard and anybody that isn’t willing to grow will get left behind.

    And I agree, not everyone is going to be ready to step up to that standard from Day 1. I can build anyone to that standard, just got to show up and put the work in. And like I plan on telling them if you’re here it’s because you believe in hard work and being better today than you were yesterday.

    I talked to some of my people and pulled some strings so next year, they’re going to be set up for success. And I got approval to replace those god-awful “uniforms” so I’m working on getting those picked out. As part of the rite of passage, you have to earn the right to wear this uniform. In order to earn that uniform, it’s going to take hard work, determination, and discipline.

    (And if you’re wondering why this sounds so familiar, this is straight out of Uncle Sam’s playbook. The Navy has been doing it like this for generations.)
     
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  16. musicteach

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    So I got uniforms ordered today, probably take 7-8 weeks on that. My friends hooked the uni band up with some brand new sticks for the percussion (OMG matching drum sticks!?), mallets and some other things they’re desperately in need of. Even got drum line some new drum heads for next season.

    With this week being the thanksgiving game for my high schoolers, I really wasn’t intending on telling them about leaving just yet. But apparently it got told anyways because the band wanted to know was I leaving. It was a very emotional, heartfelt moment. Some of the seniors were excited because they had applied (and some already been accepted) to my Uni next year which I kinda wanted to avoid but I’d what it is. I didn’t want to influence my current seniors about where to go next year and I didn’t want them to go just because I’m going to be there. But it is what it is. The underclassmen were all quite a bit upset. I think their biggest concern was relieved when they found out my current assistant band director will be taking over as band director.

    A lot of mixed feelings I got from the band. Happy and excited for me, but at the same time a little sad. I kinda wanted to wait to tell them until it was a little closer to the end of the year but maybe it’sa good thing that they know. Only time will tell. My assistant band director he kinda stepped in to and set their minds at ease. He told them he wasn’t going to erase me or undo what I had done and I think that really helped.