1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

An update: Out at 60 and finally feeling joy

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by cornersky, Sep 9, 2022.

  1. cornersky

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2022
    Messages:
    25
    Likes Received:
    60
    Location:
    Michigan USA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Hi friends:

    It's been a long time since I checked in and shared an update. I write this particularly for those who are older and may be struggling in coming out or being out. After 60 years, I came out as bi first to myself last January. It was exhilarating but mostly terrifying. It helped so much coming out next on this site where I found tremendous support and encouragement. Next, I told my 2 adult daughters (it went fantastic), then told one of my 3 brothers (so happy for me), joined a few online dating sites, accidentally outed myself to a colleague who saw my dating profile (we both work for a Christian denomination. He was thrilled because he is still in the closet and finally had someone to talk to) but then....the whole journey stalled. I was living one foot in and one foot out of the closet. I struggled and finally took this group's advice to find a therapist and talk to my doctor about my ongoing anxiety. My therapist happens to also be gay and it was so freeing o talk to someone without fear and judgement. And here we are, 9 months later. Last week a guy liked my dating profile. Finally, i had the confidence to like him back. We talk for hours every day, He's a little bit younger than me, but has been out for more than 20 years. I have never had an experience like this before and my life has bloomed. I am feeling real joy and freedom. We are going to meet in person in about a week (we live 3 hours from each other). I told him, even if this doesn't work out he has already given me a gift that has forever changed my life. He has made me feel desired and wanted. This weekend I am going to my first PRIDE event with my kids. In January the idea of attending a PRIDE event would have been completely terrifying. So, I offer these words of encouragement. If you are new here, listen to this caring group. It does get better. You can have the life you dream about. You have value. You deserve to feel joy and love. Be patient. Be kind to yourself. And if you are struggling, please find someone to talk to. I found an online therapist and it has been life changing. For now, share your heart and I hope to read an amazing update about your life soon.
     
    Rayland, Gay Brett, Isbjorn and 4 others like this.
  2. McLate

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2022
    Messages:
    17
    Likes Received:
    14
    Location:
    Ireland
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Thanks for posting cornersky. It's inspiring to hear how your life is blooming. Your daughters sound wonderful - hope you have a great time at the pride event. Also hope your date goes well and the connection is even better in person. It can be difficult to allow ourselves be vulnerable and show our true selves but taking the risk brings rewards
     
  3. quebec

    Advisor Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2014
    Messages:
    3,437
    Likes Received:
    1,791
    Location:
    U.S.
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    cornersky.....Thanks so much for the uplifting post! :old_smile: There are so many folks here on EC that really need to hear that in spite of everything, there is hope to have a life that will allow them to be happy. Even though our Western Society is getting better, it is still a rough road for so many of our LGBTQ Family, especially for the Later in Life LGBTQ Folks...believe me I know as I am one of them! To have someone post a "Happy Story" is such an encouragement is wonderful! :old_big_grin: Thanks so very much!!
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
    #3 quebec, Sep 10, 2022
    Last edited: Sep 10, 2022