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am i just bisexual?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by masterofnone, Nov 6, 2021.

  1. masterofnone

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    so i identify as straight and always have. i’ve got ocd and it makes me question if i’m gay, which sometimes feels like it could be real but then other times it seems like the most unrealistic thing ever. but what if my ocd has been trying to tie down completely straight or completely gay and i’m bisexual?
    i do see attractive guys when i’m walking around the streets and i get an anxiety spike. before this i would more view them as competition if that makes sense. i can’t tell if it’s just a platonic attraction or sexual. i’ve never masturbated to gay fantasies only straight ones. never gotten hard with a guy either. but is that because i just haven’t allowed myself to feel those attractions? i mean i have tried to get into it but it doesn’t feel right i guess.
     
  2. FireFox

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    Maybe have some quiet time alone and allow yourself to feel those attractions and see where this goes.
     
  3. masterofnone

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    i’ve tried masturbating to guys i think are attractive. but it just doesn’t get me off. like i think ryan gosling is a very good looking dude but i can’t picture myself doing anything like that with him or any guy tbh.
     
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  4. Sadness

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    I think im in the same boat tbh. I already tested a lot with fantasies and pictures, and while most i didnt feel nothing, some i had some erection and orher even a complete erection. I dont know what i am ,what i am feeling, or if im straight. There was a moment where a friend hugged me from behind and i was uncomfortable but felt tingle too. After that i stated testing thinking about him rubbing his part in me and i had almost a complete erection, this just ended my night since i couldnt stop testing anymore at that moment, tried think even beeing a bottom and had some erection too.

    This pretty sure makes me not straight right? But when i headed home i tried masturbating to this and i couldnt, didnt felt pleasure or anything. I tried maybe 3 times but i wasnt feeling arousal

    So what am i? I have the same question as you.
     
  5. Chip

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    The answer to both of you is the same: OCD. Nothing to do with sexual orientation.
     
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  6. Sadness

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    Yeah i forgot to add this at the end of my post. We have a problem to deal at the end of the day. Ocd
     
  7. BiGemini87

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    I'm inclined to agree with Chip: If it doesn't feel right and it doesn't come naturally, chances are that you aren't gay. Is it possible that you are (or that you're bi)? Sure. But from what you've posted here, it seems more like the OCD is responsible than any actual attraction.

    I don't recall if you've ever mentioned before; are you pursuing therapy for this? If not, it might be something to consider. The sooner you receive the guidance you need, the less you'll have to struggle later. :slight_smile:
     
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  8. Sadness

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    The real problem is how we know for sure of everything thats happening, at least for me.

    I was masturbating to a girl and switched to a guy and thought about doing a bj for him, i was still hard and felt arousal. This just confused me. How do i know for sure that its ocd, you guys always tell me and i believe but why something like this happened? It just feels like its not ocd and just that im bi.

    This is for me but maybe the op feels the same way. How to be sure of whats going on
     
    #8 Sadness, Nov 10, 2021
    Last edited: Nov 10, 2021
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  9. quebec

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    #9 quebec, Nov 10, 2021
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  10. PurpleDude

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    Didn't quote anyone as I'm just throwing my 2 cents in. Years ago I started watching gay porn and found it arousing to the point that I started watching it more than guy/girl scenes and this started to concern me. I did some digging online and found a post by someone that stated that it wasn't at all unusual and it wasn't necessarily the gay aspect that I was responding to and may possibly be the sex act itself. this actually did put me at ease because it had been quite some time since I'd had a partner and it was more fantasy than something I wanted to participate in. Now I think about possibly dating a guy as something I'd have to seriously consider if I met one I liked enough that I couldn't stop thinking about him. Beyond that I've stopped worrying about it. Fantasies don't hurt anyone unless we take them too seriously and life is too short to stop ourselves from taking a leap that could end up leading to something really good for us.

    P.S. When I was looking up info on my "dilemma" one of the places I found was this sight, this wasn't where I found the posting that I mentioned though. I did like what I saw here enough that I stuck around.
     
    #10 PurpleDude, Nov 11, 2021
    Last edited: Nov 11, 2021
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  11. Sadness

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    Yeah, porn is not a good reliable source for you to know your sexuality. Since porn is made to turn people on, no matter what we see.

    People say fantasies seems to be a good evidence, but im not so sure anymore