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A nice guy I met on vacation

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by trojan, Oct 1, 2022.

  1. trojan

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    I met a guy that is much younger than me last winter while on vacation. Like half my age. We were friends and ate out a lot and hiked around. As our friendship developed I noticed he never talked about girls. He seemed to cringe a little each time I told him my age. It was almost like he was hoping to forget that part and continue on. I don't look that old at all. I'm still kinda sexy. I contacted him recently and told him I am coming back soon to the vacation place.
    I will be around him for many months. I am almost certain he is gay. He is very handsome and has no girlfriend. He touched me a few times while we were walking. Other indicators too, maybe. I'm a little bit concerned I might be too old. I will be there for months and thinking I might just try to touch him.
    Its not like I have never touched a man. Now I have kissed a guy, spontaneously, and we both liked it, and another time I felt a penis, consentually. I am pretty sure I would like to kiss this guy at the vacation place, and probably much more than that.
    I will have time and he sounds still single. He touched me a few times. I'm not sure what to do next. I will see him soon. I have been with a number of women, but not for a while. I'm thinking of this handsome guy a lot and it's a kind of romantic place where I will see him. He sounds excited to see me again. I'm not sure what to do but I am thinking of him a lot.
     
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  2. Cinnamoon

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    Hope it goes well
     
  3. BiGemini87

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    Hello, @trojan. If you're okay with it, could you maybe elaborate on how he touched you? I'm just trying to understand the context of the contact. Was it like a light touch on the arm, the leg, a hug, playful nudging, etc?

    I hope your time in his company proves to be positive and enjoyable. Let us know how it goes? :slight_smile:
     
  4. trojan

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    He touched me on the forearms a few times while we were walking. Just like actually stroke my arm
    And one time when we parted he pat me on the lower back. Often he invaded my space when we would be talking, like his face a foot away from mine. Sometimes when talking and getting close to me like that I would get intimidated and sort of back down, and he was sort of in charge even though half my age. Each time I bought up my age he sort of winced, which I took as a bad sign.
    Like I said, since I started EC I have become bolder. I have met guys with the intention of seducing them however not yet.
    I kissed a guy a few times and stroked his arm.
    Another time while swimming a guy let me feel his penis.
    Both of these experiments were very nice and exciting.
    I keep thinking about my friend, I will be around him for quite a while. I'm ready to be with a man.
    Any suggestions? A romantic walk and try for a kiss?
    He was going to cook me dinner one time but it didn't happen. Should I wait for that? Should I initiate even though I am so much older? I think it would be something else to have a boyfriend for the winter
     
  5. Jakebusman

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    When you gonna see him again ?
     
  6. trojan

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  7. trojan

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    I just got the impression that he wanted to be closer to me but was hesitant about it because I m so much older. Ill play it by ear but maybe try being a little more aggressive. I have been before and the guys I kissed were younger than him. Ill be more aggressive this time and make it evidence I am looking for a boyfriend
     
  8. Jakebusman

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    Maybe try a romantic walk and try to go in for a kiss
     
  9. trojan

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    I don't know if you saw my post. Please look and maybe give any pointers
     
  10. trojan

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    We do that romantic walk. Maybe I'll try holding hands. I have been more aggressive pursuing younger men than him, so I don't know why I was intimidated
     
  11. trojan

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    Did you see my reply? I'm not sure how to use this forum so maybe you didn't see my reply. I do have to say that since starting EC I have become bolder about meeting men with the idea of sex
     
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  12. Jakebusman

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    Yea try reaching out and try holding his hand while walking and see how he reacts
     
  13. trojan

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    I'll do that. I'm sort of dreaming about it right now
     
  14. Jakebusman

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    Hope it goes well keep us updated
     
  15. trojan

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    I will
     
  16. Jakebusman

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    Sorry cant give you advice on the kissing part
     
  17. Jakebusman

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    Hope what I say helps
     
  18. BiGemini87

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    Hello again, @trojan. I've seen your replies (I've been busy of late, so haven't had much opportunity to get on EC, unfortunately), but from what you've said, it does sound like he's interested in you. When you mention your age, how do you do it? Perhaps it isn't so much the reminder of the age gap that makes him wince, but the context of what you say (like if you're being self-deprecating about it, for example).

    It sounds like he's more comfortable leading, but that doesn't mean you can't take the initiative. If you want to initiate by suggesting dinner, coffee, a walk, etc. then you should go for it. :slight_smile: Just be aware of his body language and social cues before you decide to take things a step further. Or you could ask him point-blank how he feels; his touch, while not overtly sexual, does come across as intimate. Or at the very least, like he's seeking intimacy, so I'm inclined to think you're instincts are right about him.
     
  19. trojan

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    Thank you so much for your thoughtful reply. I am taking it all into consideration.
    I don't think I am being depreciative so much as a warning or something like that. As in a similar situation an older woman in my neighborhood tells me her age every time she sees me so that if I ask her out I know what I'm getting.
    I tend to say it when he gets intense and I feel like he is coming on to me a little then I for some wierd reason feel it necessary to remind him of my age.
    And he can be a little intense and intimidating at times.
    One time after we had dinner together as I entered my hotel he let his palm slide down my back and linger a moment on my ass. I carried the thought to my room.
    As I said several times he stroked my forearm delineratly.
    During every walk we did he would crowd my space and our hands would inadvertently bump together.
    He is always the one to suggest dinner together or a walk.
    One time he said he wanted to cook me dinner but it didn't happen
    Maybe he is wanting me to show more enthusiasm?
    I never touched him or initiated a date. It is always him that suggests.
    It could be that he is gay but not very experienced and is just checking it out. I think he has been thinking about me while I was gone
    Depending on his body language perhaps I need to be more aggressive. What harm can there be?
    As in another man I was flirting with in my home town. He rebuffed my advances, but now when I see him he is flattered that I noticed him.
    Anyway yeah, I think the vacation guy was seeking intimacy, and by not reciprocating, touching or asking him on a date, because I am embarrassed at our age difference, I was sort of rebuffing him.
    If his body language suggests he is gay and seeking intimacy I will need to encourage him and maybe even reach out first. We went out together a few times a week.
    Anyway looking forward to seeing him again
     
  20. Tightrope

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    You have been fairly loud and clear that you're interested. You've been honest with him, up to this point, since there's more that needs to happen ... like more clarity Forget about the wincing for now. You shouldn't read too much into that.

    You said you were on vacation. How and where did you meet, if I may ask? That "might" give clues about his availability and level of interest, or maybe not.

    I often think that handsome - or very pretty - and unattached means someone might be gay or bi. But not all the time. Sometimes, things have happened in people's lives. When people bring up other people's being single and the tone is a prying one, it can make them defensive. Maybe it's something you can both talk about and you can tell also him about your life, but make the exchange safe.

    When you got together a few times, who initiated the meetings? Was there any holding back or did it seem very willing and enthusiastic? To me, being touched on the forearm seems like a mix of being interested and breaking down normal distance barriers. It's not far from people's hands.

    This might get a little tough. You'll want to befriend this person while not pushing it over into the "friend zone," and not giving him a real quick way to do that either because his tail went between his legs.

    Since you mention that he's a lot younger, what's your pattern with what catches your eye and who you show interest to? This would be age, type, and things like that.