Still no progress in finding love. Should I just let go of life?

Love is not the only source of joy in life. <- This, first and foremost. Before reading on, you really need to contemplate this. It can suck not having this one thing that is so hyped up, but it. Is. Not. Everything.

Okay? Okay.

It's worth noting, I feel, that in actively seeking a partner, or even just dates here or there, you could be putting others off and actually ruining your chances. Most of the time, these connections need to happen naturally. Most people meet their significant others through mutual friends, or work, or whatever, so I understand joining social groups in an attempt to increase the odds of this happening for you. That said, even if someone is single, that doesn't mean they're looking to be pursued romantically. Lots of people have an "if it happens, it happens" attitude with romance and dating. And even if you did find this sort of urgent connection, it would likely not last. One or both of you wouldn't have your heart in it, and it would end, possibly very painfully.

 

Have you tried Internet dating, Mark?

I met my wonderful (late) partner on there. I know others who have found love this way. I found it easier that waiting for something to happen 'naturally'. Both parties know what they ultimately want to find, and at the very least you get a whole load of interesting experiences/ funny stories out of it.

 

Don't give up! Finding the one who can love you takes time. There are many options you can meet someone.

 

Like @Fiender said, romantic love is only a part of the joys of being human. I understand that being single can be frustrating and lonely, but it isn't the sole point in living.

Dating apps/sites/speed dating/dating events etc may help your search as they are a bit more specific than a general social group, but people on there can be a bit rude and shallow.

It sounds lame, but if you haven't already, it may be worth focusing and expanding on your passions, hobbies and platonic/familial relationships for a source of happiness

 

You will find one, don't worry. Just try to be patient.

 

That can happen, yes. But I think success on these sites requires persistence (and honesty and a light-hearted approach). Also...don't use the free ones. To get results I think you have to pay - generally the free ones have far more time-wasters on them.

 

And you will succeed. Remember what I told you.

 

@LonelyEyesMark I know it can be so discouraging when you're trying to put yourself out there and you're met with silence/lack of interest. But I promise you, there's more to life than romantic love alone. It sounds to me like there are other areas of life you could focus on improving so that when you're ready to find someone, you'll do it with confidence (and that confidence, in turn will attract the right kinds of people).

Or perhaps it isn't so much that you need to work through a lot else, but that you need to temper your expectations a bit. Maybe try entering into friendship first, then building from there. Dating apps can work wonders at times, but it can take a long time to find someone that matches you in the ways that most matter.

 

Wow. I can't believe people would even tell you that. You're not too messed up or a loser, those people need to take a look at themselves. Pathetic move of them. There are many autistic people who are in successful relationships. If you could find someone, who's also autistic, I believe you two will share something in common.

 

Did you have the chance to talk to one?