About 5 years ago, my cousin came to visit me and I wasn't going to stop my personal life all because she was visiting me. I had my friend with benefits over one night and we had sex. My cousin clearly figured out what we doing, 2 grown men in my bedroom. However longer later, my fwb left and I received a text from my mom asking if I'm gay or if my cousin was playing a joke on her. "Mom, I'm into dating girls. But I am open to having sex with guys. I guess I'm bisexual, but I do want a family and kids one day" To this day, my parents think I'm completely gay, kind of accepting of it, but don't acknowledge the fact I also like girls. I have no idea how to communicate this to them. Even some of my friends don't get that I'm bi, leaning straight in terms of relationships. It's kind of like masquerading reverse coming out.
I do not really understand the title that you used. Really you already have said it as well as you can but sometimes people need to come out to others more than once until those people finally accept it. You might simply have to keep saying what you have already said. There is also a big problem in society (even among many LGBT+ people) of bisexual erasure. If you say you are bi but are currently in a straight seeming relationship then you must really be straight. Conversely if you say you are bi but in a same sex relationship then you are totally gay. If you vary who you date over a moderate time period then you are just greedy or promiscuous (which bisexuals are often accused of). It would really be nice if more people just accepted that some people are not monosexual (probably a lot more than most people suspect).
Well its way above narrow minded people's heads. Most people I'm out of the closet with think I'm full on gay and only date women for social convention. Guys I've dated don't believe I'm bisexual because I am a total bottom but I do enjoy vaginal sex, I just don't like penetrating other peoole anally. Anyway, its my business what I do in my personal life, I guess its just up to me to control it.
Sometimes it's easier to convince people in how we live, rather than in what we say. You have already made it clear that you prefer to date the opposite sex and wish to have a family and kids one day, so maybe you need to work towards that reality. There are some people in life who only believe it when they see it. Sounds like that applies to some of your family/friends.
@QuietPeace I can relate to what you said about bisexuality and bisexuals in general. I think you hit the nail on the head. I think it’s misunderstood. They are misunderstood sometimes. Even though according to some stats of the lgbtq community that I read recently a big percentage of the community are bi people. And I think there is a bigger yet percentage of people in the world who are not mono-sexual. Whether they be heteroflexible or mostly straight or whatever have you that are not accounted for. I don’t know what this indicates. Maybe more and more people are realizing something or other about sexuality and attraction.
Its makes you wonder how many people want to get romantic both genders but don't. I'd advise anyone who wants to try should experiment and keep it their own business...
For bi men, I think yours is the most common combination. They'll go both ways but may be more interested romantically in the opposite sex. It's just that if they're open to it, the FWB possibilities can increase a person's sexual experiences. And then a person is in the bi-zone. Some guys wouldn't even think of the possibility of FWB with another guy and you also have to put up with all the scrutiny because so many people can't even relate to the situation.
Serious question: Why does it matter? You seem to know who you are and what you want. Anybody else's drama is their drama. It doesn't need to be yours.
Hi in my own talks with therapist and many readings I feel it comes to this . I am “heteromantic” and sexually bi. That seems to fit my own self maybe this makes sense
Having FWB's has been wonderful for me. It some ways it has increased my appetite at home too. But as I've gotten older I find I only masturbate to the thoughts of being with a man.
