1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Sleep Problems

Discussion in 'Physical & Sexual Health' started by Denial, May 22, 2021.

  1. Denial

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2018
    Messages:
    520
    Likes Received:
    39
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Lately I’ve been sleeping really poorly. Sometimes I can’t fall asleep and other times I fall asleep but then I wake up in the middle of the night. Does this happen to anyone else? What helps you?
     
  2. SteveBi45

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 15, 2021
    Messages:
    138
    Likes Received:
    92
    Location:
    Europe
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    It doesn’t happen so often anymore, but I used to have this problem a lot. Most of the time I would wake with a million thoughts going through my head and then I would stress that I couldn’t sleep.

    For me, the best solution was some meditation. I have a couple of apps on my phone with prerecorded exercises, including ones to help you sleep. They work 99% of the time for me.
     
    Denial and ErickWolf like this.
  3. ErickWolf

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2015
    Messages:
    338
    Likes Received:
    29
    Location:
    Virginia, US
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I've found stuff like quiet, relaxing music, white noise, nature sounds, etc to be very helpful for insomnia. It's not foolproof, but when I'm lucky, I can put in my headphones, lean back, and be out like a light. I also second meditation and breathing exercise type stuff, that can be helpful as well.
     
    Kyrielles and Denial like this.
  4. QuietPeace

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2020
    Messages:
    1,706
    Likes Received:
    1,154
    Location:
    Northern Europe
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I have had severe sleep issues since the late 80s. First you need to have good "sleep hygiene", make sure that you keep to a schedule even on the weekends by getting to bed around the same time and just as important you get up at about the same time. Use your bed only for sleep or sex, do not use it for TV or other things (in fact not having any screens in the bedroom is best, whether TV, phone, tablet, computer etc). When you do go to bed if you toss and turn for more than 15 minutes go ahead and get up and do something relaxing for a while then try again (no screens during this time though). Keep your bedroom cool in temperature and as dark as you can get it.

    Other things that can help.
    • In the USA you can get melatonin over the counter. As part of having the right level of melatonin in your body (it is produced naturally) make sure that in the morning you get bright light (there are lights that you can use for this if you live someplace that does not have enough light they are used to help with seasonal affective disorder). At the other end of the day make sure that you are not exposed to bright light, keep lights dim in the evenings and stop using screens at least an hour preferably even 2 or more hours before bedtime.
    • Chamomile tea or other relaxing non-caffeinated teas. Caffeine should be avoided after noon and if that is not enough stop drinking it at all. Though drink it a bit early, make sure to lower your fluid intake a bit before bed so that you do not have to get up in the middle of the night. (exactly how long depends on the person)
    • Progressive relaxation at night just before you try to sleep (where you tense an area for a few seconds and then relax it, start at your feet and work your way up to your head).
    • Yoga, Tai Chi or other light exercise but not within 3 hours of bedtime, no heavy exercise close to bed time.
    • Meditation is good as mentioned above. Learning to do so takes time. It is good to start with 5 minutes and work your way up from there.
    • Having a soft background noise can help or possibly earplugs to cut everything out.
    • If the problem is not being able to turn off the thoughts in your mind meditation and mindfulness training can help, also seeing a therapist to work through issues.
    • If nothing else helps consult a doctor.

    For waking in the middle of the night. This is not unusual, knowing this can help you relax about it. Try to just roll over and relax. If it takes more than 15 minutes go ahead and get up and again do something relaxing until you are tired again. Again, no screens.
     
    #4 QuietPeace, May 23, 2021
    Last edited by a moderator: May 23, 2021
  5. Denial

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2018
    Messages:
    520
    Likes Received:
    39
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Thank you everyone!
     
  6. bingostring

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2008
    Messages:
    2,083
    Likes Received:
    113
    Location:
    England
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Are you napping in the day? Try to avoid that as it reduces how sleepy you are at night.
    Search “sleep hygiene” as the poster above mentions
    Do you suffer anxiety? This can keep your mind racing at night and also mess with the quality of your real sleep.

    Important you solve this as good sleep is a foundation for every day of your life ...
     
    #6 bingostring, Jun 1, 2021
    Last edited: Jun 1, 2021
    Denial likes this.
  7. MikeL1962

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2021
    Messages:
    69
    Likes Received:
    35
    Location:
    Menomonie Wisconsin
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Turn off all your electronic devices..go for a walk and let yourself naturally wind down....I have major sleep issues because of my work schedule...and these things have helped me tremendously..also read before bed time.
     
    Shorthaul and Denial like this.
  8. Denial

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2018
    Messages:
    520
    Likes Received:
    39
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Yeah, I probably shouldn't nap. Yes, I do have a lot of anxiety. I do like to read so I'll keep that in mind.
     
    MikeL1962 likes this.
  9. QuietPeace

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2020
    Messages:
    1,706
    Likes Received:
    1,154
    Location:
    Northern Europe
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Something that I forgot to mention in my original answer. Do not use alcohol to help make you drowsy. It can help you get to sleep initially but it also causes disturbances in the quality of sleep so overall the effects are deleterious to your sleep.
     
    Denial and MikeL1962 like this.
  10. SteveBi45

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 15, 2021
    Messages:
    138
    Likes Received:
    92
    Location:
    Europe
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    Yes, I agree. Alcohol is terrible for sleep quality and also for your system in general if you drink too regularly.
     
    MikeL1962 and Denial like this.
  11. Denial

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2018
    Messages:
    520
    Likes Received:
    39
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I don't drink any alcohol.
     
    MistyMorn and MikeL1962 like this.
  12. Loves books

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 4, 2017
    Messages:
    1,475
    Likes Received:
    102
    Location:
    Ireland
    I actually ended up reading a book about sleep because I had trouble but I just have a messed up sleep cycle. I can sleep and sleep well but just not the same time as everyone else. Clean sheets can help sleep but that’s just a one time thing. Writing down all your worries before you try to sleep is supposed to help. My mother swears by the Calm app. She had most of the same problems as you. Total darkness is supposed to help sleep. I’ve never tried it because I’m a grown adult still scared of the dark. The doctors great suggestion was go to bed and wake up the same time every day.
     
    Denial likes this.
  13. MistyMorn

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2019
    Messages:
    114
    Likes Received:
    47
    Location:
    US
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I have anxiety and insomnia on a regular basis. Oddly enough I find that if I keep myself busy and distracted from the pressures of falling asleep that when I'm ready I lay down and fall asleep. It also keeps my mind from racing with all the pointless thoughts in the middle of the night. Idk try it maybe it will help. In fact it's what I'm doing right now lol
     
    Denial and MikeL1962 like this.