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Confused about my sexuality....

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Pham897, May 26, 2021.

  1. Pham897

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    Hi everyone!
    I'm new here and don't know much about sexuality. I'm a girl and it just dawned on me that whenever I see attractive females in provocative clothes/in bikinis, I will stare at their bodies, my heart will beat faster and my breath will get heavier. Is that what attraction feels like? Does that mean i'm attracted to the same sex? I've never felt this way with a guy tho....im just confused
     
  2. LilLady9

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    I would say it can definitely be a part of what attraction feels like.

    Could be, but not necessarily... You would have to consider quite a few other things to determine if you're attracted to the same sex.

    I can understand that would make you confused but that alone doesn't mean you aren't attracted to guys, or are attracted to girls.
     
    #2 LilLady9, May 26, 2021
    Last edited: May 26, 2021
  3. Sadness

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    Hi.

    I don't think this means that you are attracted to girls tbh. I have this sometimes with men but for me its more a concern feeling driven by anxiety rather than a attraction. I never understand what attraction feels like, so i cant say for sure, but i don't remember me getting those feelings with attractive women, it was more like a good feeling, and a good shiver throughout my body, and of course, arousal.

    So only this doesn't mean nothing i think, do you feel aroused by woman? This is what matter regarding sexuality i think.
     
    #3 Sadness, May 26, 2021
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  4. QuietPeace

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    Welcome to EC.

    It could be attraction and if it is that does mean that you have same sex attraction (given that you list yourself as female). It could just be anxiety. Do you ever have sexual fantasies directed towards women? That could determine a bit more.

    What about sexual fantasies towards men?

    If all of your fantasies are directed towards women and none towards men that is pretty much the definition of being lesbian.
     
  5. LilLady9

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    Doesn't*
    I assume that's what you meant to type? Otherwise, what you said is somewhat of a contradiction... is it attraction or anxiety, or both?

    Pardon me for such a silly question, but what is the difference between attraction and sexual attraction?
     
    #5 LilLady9, May 27, 2021
    Last edited: May 27, 2021
  6. Pham897

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    Thank you for your reply! I mean...when I see those attractive females I imagine having sex with them and feel like I want to touch their bodies and make them feel good...
     
  7. Braj

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    Hi! I also came here confused about my sexuality. I am also new and I can't say anything for sure but would like to share my thoughts.
    It may be anxiety. But sometimes anxiety and attraction can appear together. And just as others told above there are more factors to consider for sexual attraction. So, I would actually say to explore your feelings further. Please do post here if you have anything to say anytime :slight_smile:
     
  8. QuietPeace

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    So now my answer goes from a maybe yes to a definite yes.
     
  9. Braj

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    Sharing my experience, I used to stare at female bodies in an attempt to find something to deny that I am gay. Although I had these tingling feeling and increased heart rate, I didn't have any sexual attraction as to feeling to touch, kiss etc... So, I would say that this was just anxiety (because I was doing something I didn't want to and didn't know how things will turn out). Whereas, with men I have sexual attraction, though I am a bit nervous too.
     
  10. Braj

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    I agree with @QuietPeace . And, you don't have such feelings for men?