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Kissed a straight Guy??

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Johanz, Oct 9, 2014.

  1. Damien

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    If he's like that, I'm not sure I'd even want to just have a casual fling, let alone get to know him better. I must admit, I'm also sometimes sexually attracted to people I don't actually like (in terms of their personal qualities), but when I really think about mixing energies (not to mention bodily fluids) with someone like that...I feel a bit like, ugh...
     
  2. whereamigoing

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    Okay no need for labels here but no guy willing to do that many sexual things woth you is straight
    no way. I've unfortunately been through the process of doing what you're doing but the "straight guy stopped it after the first time. no more. if you really like him and are willing ti do stuff with him go for it. but don't let him hurt you or your self esteem. sincerely yours, jay
     
  3. Damien

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    Well, in the Kinsey scale there's one through to six...maybe those supposed 'straight guys' (I'm not singling out the op or his friend, just talking generally) are sort of 'Kinsey 2's' or something like that, but despite being just a bit Bi, are still trying to cling to the straight identity in their minds. If someone mostly has sex with girls, but occasionally likes, enjoys, ie gets off on having sex with guys, gosh folks can label that as they like but 'straight' that is not! :lol:
     
    #23 Damien, Dec 27, 2014
    Last edited: Dec 27, 2014
  4. IWICCO

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    Johanz, yes this is the place for you. Feel free to vent all you want. There is nothing wrong with wanting to have some fun with this guy but I am most concerned about you not putting yourself in a position to be hurt.

    I agree with the other posters that this guy is not straight so I would not dwell on that. He sounds like he is into you as well. Protect yourself, but it is good that you are seeing other people. Is it fair to ask that you are no longer 'questioning' yourself? It sounds like you are definitely into guys. I have to admit I would love to see a picture of this guy. He sounds gorgeous.

    Just be careful with your heart and body my friend.:icon_wink
     
  5. Johanz

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    Yeah, I know he is an ass hole and stuff, but its just his way with coping up with his sexuality. Yeah, this will sound so vain but I guess I'm purely attracted with his looks and the last time we had sex we sorta bonded and we actually talked for hours. He seems so nicer when we are alone and he doesn't have to put up that mask and persona with everyone..

    @ Damien: yeah we talked about it, this post was 3 months ago and I know for a fact that he is not straight.. Because we talked a lot about his past and his experiences. I use to think he was straight when we kissed almost 8 months ago. Since then I've been wanting to do it more with him ahaha...


    @ whereamigoing: Yeah, he is not straight I think he want it as much as I do. Yeah im just so conscious around him.. Thank you.. Il just see whats up next semester.

    IWICCO- Yeah, I guess what matters is that I'm becoming more accepting with my sexuality. I think I'm bi because I like both gender and I'm sorta okay with it now. I use to feel wrong and guilty when I seek pleasure with the opposite sex and I'm being hard on myself but with time i'm not too worried about it.
    Yeah thats what I've been doing, Im pretty logical with all these stuff, I try my best not to fall deeply for him and protect myself but Il just enjoy the ride and go with the flow on whereever it takes me. I mean I've never fallen in love but it will be a learning experience. I'm open to anything, But I have a good sense of self worth, I would never just let him hurt me. I'm here to vent and learn from different people about how to deal with it but I know I gained a lot of self awareness. I was asking for him to like me to make our relationship equal so that I'm not in the losing end lol. Yeah I'd love to share a picture but that would be unfair for him because I know I wouldn't want to share my pic with other people especially since I've talked so much about him lol..
    But he pretty much look the same as a typical Abercrombie model, "brown hair, surfer lean body type with abs. lol Irresistibly hot. I love adoring his body and licking every inch of it especially his neck and peck.. oppss :***: I should prolly stop ahah
    Ohh and for my body lo I'm going to my pediatrician Thursday, Its always awkward when he examine my penis lmao :eek:
     
  6. Itisthefear

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    i have a feeling that this guy might be using you in order to experiment or w/e with you lol.
    i think you guys need to talk about this because you never know what the future holds...just give a name to what you have...it will make matters easier and it's not nice to hide behind you finger sometimes honesty and truth is way better!
    best of luck to you
     
  7. soulcatcher

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    I love it how you desperately tried not to tergiversate, but abandoned your dignity in the blink of an eye by handing over the reigns to him.
     
  8. Damien

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    Hope I didn't sound judging in any way. Anyway I don't know if I would be able to 'resist' if I were put into your situation, either. Only thing I would make absolutely sure of, if that he doesn't have a girlfriend who is unaware of what he does 'on the side', so to speak. But if he's free and unattached, well then no harm done, and as I said, I wonder how I or many of us would respond, if a 'model' type wanted to get down and dirty with us. I ought to be humble enough to say that despite my ideals, hmm...but still, I would still choose someone I had a positive emotional connection with any day, over someone who had the face on an angel, yet was 'an asshole'. But in the absence of anything at all...who knows what most of us would do. I certainly don't judge, just wanted to tell you that. :slight_smile:
     
    #28 Damien, Dec 28, 2014
    Last edited: Dec 28, 2014
  9. crazyDepression

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    First off , I have no idea what a FWB is
    Secondly , Yes they can get with guys just because they're horny idk probably they have a big dick and just wanna compare it or they just wanna see another guy's dick (I have "Friends" like this , They're assholes , i dont socialise with them but i have seen it happen in the school's toilet which i just quietly backed out cause it was dark as fuck (The Penis)
    And , if you wanna hook up just remember to use protection!
    Hope this helped
     
  10. IWICCO

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    Let me be clear that I would never ask you to actually post his pic. I definitely respect his privacy and yours. I find it very interesting that the two of you have had intimate moments after sex where you feel like you have bonded. I am a romantic at heart and just wonder where this can go, but I am foremost a realist about who a person is. I personally think this is quickly moving away from you 'questioning' your sexuality to you trying to figure out how you feel about him. It does sound like he may be masking his true self because of his own uncertainties, but I do have issues with people who are racist or homophobic. Do you feel that is who he really is or just a mask?

    I am glad to hear you know your self worth. Don't ever let anyone take that from you. Also, what brought you to sleep with another guy? Was it total lust or to prove something to this guy without him even knowing it?

    ---------- Post added 28th Dec 2014 at 07:49 PM ----------

    I meant to ask, what do you mean about the pediatrician? I assume you are at least in your 20s so what pediatrician do you have? Also, what is your concern about an exam? What's with the penis exam? Should you be more concerned about an anal exam?! LOL!
     
  11. Johanz

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    Itisthefear: I'm well aware of the situation, I wouldn't say he is just using me for my body. Its more like a mutual fun and it all with consent and I'm pretty much attracted with him to so I don't mind just experimenting with pleasure with him lol :icon_bigg:slight_smile: I honestly dont know how to bring the topic, we normally dont talk about our relationship. I intend on just going with the flow and keep experimenting with him. Also, we never really talked about having sex we just do it, well when he text me we have a secret code for if we want too hook up lol.. I don't know I dont think he is looking for a relationship.. And I'm not ready to have a relationship either..

    soulcatcher: Lol What do you mean :dry: Im just playing hard to get lol... It doesnt mean I dont want him.. I'm just scared I would fall in love with and get too attached. thats why I distanced a lil bit..

    crazyDepression: Friends with benefits lol: yeah this dude is no0t straight tho lol yup and Im playing safe no worries lol

    Damien: I was not sure if he had a girl friend before but I'm certein he is curretnly not dating anyone, although, I know he is hooking up with other people for sure.. :tears::tantrum::tantrum: lol I definitely feel this intense arousal from him tho so Idk its a lil tricky ahahha I understand what you are saying tho.. but I can't help it, I think im so into him hahaha :bang::bang:



     
  12. Jeff

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    I would not put a label on it or ask him if he considers himself anything. I would not even get him to admit he likes guys, or likes guys and girls. I would keep this what it is, and that is hot sex. It may develop into friendship and other things. But for now, it's sex. And that might be enough since you really do not want a relationship at this time. So I would try and keep it as it is, perhaps be a little hard to get, but nothing enough that he gives up on you. If he is super hot, he will have other options sooner or later. You just need to be ready for that next guy to come along and take your place, if that is the way it's going to go. Or a new girlfriend. and you are gone, out!

    The best way to hold onto this sexually charged friend with no strings (so far), is not talk about it with other people, he needs your confidence not to talk about it. And not box him into saying he is gay. No labels on him, and best not you (to him) either. This is just guy fun, "whatever fun" to him.

    So at 20 years old, I would let this run it's course and have an amazing time getting experience while you have this great time.
     
  13. soulcatcher

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    Alternatively, you could just confront him and tell him like it is. He will probably feel much better when he figures out his sexuality and confronts it head on, instead of shamefully trying to bust a nut. It will be a much better option for both of you in the long run. He will learn to confront his fears. You, on the other hand, will be able to move on from this toxic, unsustainable relationship and will have more time (and energy) to focus on dealing with your fear of intimacy with guys.
     
  14. IWICCO

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    I was molested as well when I was young, so I know where you are coming from. Why do you feel you are so fucked up? Is this contributing to your intimacy issues? Going through what we both did is a life-altering experience. I am still dealing with it, but know I have come a long way from have suicidal thoughts and completely depressed years ago. You will find that there is life afterwards and it does not have to rule our life. I also posted a thread that stating that I feel my molestation helped to define my orientation. I have finally learned to fully accept that I am bi, but prefer men.

    You are young and unattached, so just enjoy yourself safely. If you are falling for this guy or just want to have fun what's the harm? You appear to have some walls up and are guarding your heart. I completely understand, but don't let that keep you from finding happiness. Not that I am saying this guy is the one, but just relax and release.
     
  15. matthewmatthew

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    how is everything going now?

    I did not understand...Did you guys have sex again after the sucking dicks momments?
     
  16. Johanz

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    Jeff-
    Yeah, we never really talked about sexual orientation, and thats true I dont want him to admit to anything.. Yeah I'm sorta okay friends with him.. ahah Yeah I played hard to get lol it took us another 2 months to hook up :slight_smile: yeah I know for a fact he is hooking up with other people, Im okay with it.. I believe he hooked up with another guy 2 weeks ago.. but im okay with it.. I try not to be so available.. haha like denied him twice and the third time he asked me I messed around with him for 3 hours ahaha 3 rounds lol
    yeah I never talked about it before, but I think I slipped before. it was before you even said this tho, now I feel awful. I think I said something to my roommate and they are pretty close. but he sorta knew about him tho. but he doesnt know we have been hooking up.. lol I wonder what is he gonna think of me.. Yeah im having fun..

    IWICCO-
    Yeah, I was exposed to sexual stuff at such a young age. I know for a fact my sexual life is not normal, I feel like sex is just so casual for me and I feel like Im a slut. -__- I'm scared of relationship, I feel like I would never find true love, because I dont think I can love someone more than myself.. I know that sounds so selfish but yeah thats fucked up but atleast Im aware of it.. But who knows I'm only 20, horny and a hormonal mess ( i meant changes ahah) well thank God i'm not suicidal tho, but I did a lot of self-loathing, the guilt, the remorse and just feeling like crap for liking stuff when my cousin molested me.. It made me very sexually insatiable and Im constantly wanting it.. but then I was raised in catholic upbringing and every time I go to church I would pray to God to please make this stop. It almost destroyed me but now I realized I shouldn't care and I think he doesn't care who I like either. But I still have a lot of fear on coming out as Bi tho. I dont think I'l ever have the guts to tell my family or friends but maybe in time..

    and I think I'm deff just infatuated with him because its been 8 months since we first messed around and I remember being obsess about him. Like it was crazy I cant stop thinking about him and how hot he was ahahha like it was so bad that I look at his pics in FB more than normal. ahah yeah I dont think this is the guy either. I'm not as obsess anymore. and I dont think about him alot anymore. I still find him very attractive but the intense desire to have sex with him is not bad anymore.. ahah

    matthewmatthew- oh sorry I dont go here often but yeah I can give out a follow up.

    Anyways, its been 3 weeks since I was back at college, I was waiting for him to hit me up, I didnt get to see him much besides friday.. So I always try to look good then haha.. We did have sex few days ago, for 3 hours ahahha.. he is like a bunny rabbit lol 3 rounds for 3 hours with like a 20 minute break haha
    I was offended that he just notice my tattoo which is pretty huge ahha but then again we hooked up with out alcohol at all. usually we always messed around under the influence but now we are both sober.. I feel like im doing all the work tho, but I guess its what I get messing up with "straight guys" which he is not completely lol but no one is putting label on him.. I like when he kisses my neck tho.. next time im just gonna introduce a lot of role playing.. :wink:
     
  17. Afterfshn

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    Wow i just read all your threads, it's an intresting story. I don't think he is bi-curious anymore if he happens to hook up with so many dudes. I'm also curious where do you guys stand now? do you guys text at all or?
     
  18. Johanz

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    Aftershn- I really don't know where we stand, I don't even really know if we are friends.. I would really like to be good friends with him.. But I don't wanna be the one who is doing all the effort you know.. And yeah we barely text.. He only text me when I see him, like the only time he text me was last Friday when I saw him at the cafeteria, that evening he texted me that he is horny.. I guess we just a a purely sexual relationship nothing more or less.. I really wish we are more friends tho.. He is better friend with my roomate tho..